Too pooped to post so I'll be posting details about the horse show after it's over. In the meantime I thought I'd continue on with my posts of baby pictures from the past. This picture of Rhythm definitely says something. Not sure what though, any ideas?
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Part 1
I must admit even if there hadn't been a horse show, I was not all that enthused about the royal wedding. I did think, however, by going to the horse show I'd be able to escape some of the fanfare. Imagine my surprise to arrive at the show at about 6:15 am and every where I turned someone seems to be talking about the wedding, the dress, the kiss on the balcony.
It's a good thing not all that many people are there at that early hour because, me, I'm there to do horse stuff and talk horse stuff. At least I could escape the wedding stories and go ride my horse, or that was the plan anyway.
I knew they were having trail classes in the beef barn arena beginning at 8. That meant setting up the course probably at 7 so if I hurried I could get Legs bitted up and lunged with that drop line before the got started, or so I thought.
I barely got to the beef barn arena when they pulled up to set the trail course. That sent me off to the warm-up arena to get my horse lunged. I got there and the footing was being worked by the tractor so I had to wait for that to get done before I could work Legs.
Once done with that I planned to ride Legs in the main arena because he always does much better for his classes if he's had a chance to see that arena before the start of the session. Just as I got to that arena, they closed the sucker down for dragging but I was told once it was done I could ride so I waited..........and I waited........and I waited.
I finally schooled Legs in the warm-up arena and he was good but it's just not the same thing as schooling in the show pen. With his issues over the last couple of years with that show arena, I was very disappointed I didn't get in there because we had a class near the end of the morning session.
This is a new schedule for this show and as usually happens with new schedules there turned out to be some issues. The trail classes took 2 1/2 hours. The halter classes actually had horses and the morning session drug on into the late afternoon.
So........with all those people handing around waiting for their classes, what did they talk about? The royal wedding, or course! I was beginning to think earplugs were in order. AND I almost resorted to doing a search on my phone to see that d*mn dress the young women were all talking about. BUT I didn't, I resisted that temptation and instead read through the comments on yesterdays post.
I must admit I got a good chuckle out of some of those comments. I didn't reply because I'm not that good with my phone yet but I'm definitely thinking that maybe I need a tatoo of the Souther Way on the palm of my hand so I can refer to it whenever the need arises.
Without only three hours of sleep last night, I'm headed off to bed. Will post more about the horse show later but for now, I can tell you it was an interesting experience and I did NOT let anything get me down. I had a fun time and got to visit with a number of friends I've not seen in a while.
A Little Drama in the Warm-Up
This picture is Chance and every time I see it I think it needs a caption. There's definitely something going on in his brain as he studies that puddle. What do you think he'd be saying if he could talk?
The Royal Wedding may be taking over the world's attention but I could care less. My focus this weekend is on the Daffodil All Arabian Spring Horse Show at the fairgrounds in Puyallup. Temperatures still at least 10° below normal don't seem to have dampened the enthusiasm of the Arab set. Entries seem to be consistent with other years despite the fact we all still feel like it's winter.
My horse has not shed out yet and is nowhere near fit because the weather had not be conducive to outside schooling but that's not stopping us. This horse show has been a tradition for me from the time I first began showing. I have not missed participating in a single Daffodil Spring show either as a volunteer or showing. In actuality the only years I did not show my horse was when I was the show's manager.
First thing when I arrived at the showgrounds, I ran into Paint Girl making her way to the beef barn arena to lunge a horse. We spoke briefly about how many horses her barn had brought and my plans for the show. Hopefully our paths will cross again before the end of this thing. It was nice to see a friendly face.
As you can imagine there are some not so friendly faces at the show. As luck would have it we are stalled in the same barn but not on the same aisle. I'm going to get lots of practice in keeping my emotions under check, I can tell you that.
I bitted Legs up and lunged him in the beef barn arena before riding him there in the snaffle. The wind was quite strong and Legs wasn't sure what to think of flapping banners and the large tent just outside the arena but by the time I got on him, he was handling things quite well.
Schooling in the snaffle he was very soft and I was quite pleased. Then we changed to the curb bit and went up to the show arena to school there. That session was not nearly as good with Legs bracing a little at the poll and elevated a little more than usual. I never did quite get him where I wanted. I suspect the new to me bridle I am using isn't hanging that bit just right so I'll be doing some experimenting with it in the morning before the session starts. Although I must admit to a considerable amount of tension in my body that certainly could be affecting him.
Legs was a sport tolerating a very cold water bath pretty late in the day. Although I must admit, I feel guilty bathing him when it's this cold outside. Clipping tonight, his patience was wearing a bit thin especially about clipping his not yet dry legs. Touch ups will definitely be in order when the clippers are recharged.
I'll be up early and out of here to get that schooling session in and cleaning up my streaky clip job. I still have to do some work on Legs' hooves and hopefully he'll be looking something like a show horse instead of a pretty pasture ornament.
Wish us luck.......... I think we're gonna need it!
This picture is another one of Rhythm. He was not very old in this picture but as you can see pretty athletic.
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First off, I want to thank everyone for their support and comments throughout this series and particularly on both the post about the troll and the betrayal post. I did not respond to comments individually on those two posts as I did the others. Words can't express my feelings about the overwhelming support I have received. It is truly humbling particularly knowing I have been breaking some taboos by talking about these things in such an open forum in the first place. It was validating to know I did not make this walk alone.
Then I really want to address the issue of this troll. While I respect the opinions of those who believe doing so is "feeding" the issue, I can't help but feel walking away from it isn't really productive either. I may never be able to change this person's mind but I think I should at least take on what she's said so maybe she might question it. After that if the troll chooses to continue on in her line of thinking, I guess that is her choice. At least I will have made an attempt to open her eyes to some dangerous ground she is walking upon.
I think it's unfortunate when someone gets sucked into something they don't really understand and behave in such an inappropriate manner as this troll did. To attack someone you don't even know either because others are and you want to be part of the group or because you have been manipulated into believing untruths speaks far more to the issues of this troll than they do to issues of mine. That really concerns me. I see either of these scenarios as a vulnerability that could easily be exploited and I would hope this troll does not leave herself open in this manner from this point forward.
Like several who stated in the comments, I , too, believe this came from a young person. It is not just her mention of showing against GD that leads me to this assumption but also her grammar, spelling, phrasing very much speak to many of today's youth. With that information and the IP information associated with this comment, I believe I actually know who this person is.
The comment certainly speaks to some sense of loyalty for all parties from BG and WF's barn. While I think loyalty is something to be respected when it is appropriate, I also believe it's very important it not be blindly given. I think loyalty needs to be something we give based honesty and integrity, NOT on what someone tell us they are, but what they truly are.
Unfortunately too many young people, and there are adults too, who freely give their loyalty to people who have not earned it and surely don't deserve it. Certainly bullying and gang violence are good examples of loyalty gone amok. Just because some one comes off as likeable or even charismatic does not mean they should be blindly followed. The fact this troll feels this sense of loyalty so strongly for people who clearly don't deserve it certainly concerns me.
I saw enough while working horses at that facility to know that young people are exploited there. To see BG go off on a kid because he was in a foul mood and they dared question him was a sobering experience. Teenagers are so vulnerable, their self esteems so at risk, watching BG laughing and playing with them on one hand like he is their very best friend and then ripping them to shreds on the other, screaming "Get TF out of my barn" for some imagined transgression they're never going to quite get was appalling. That is only the tip of the iceberg of the manipulative behavior done to keep their band of followers close to them.
Considering the fact the man annihilated my self esteem and I am an adult, I can only imagine what he does to those kids he claims to care so much about. I know the comment he made to me about a teenage girl needing to have her whohoo sewn shut totally blew me out of the water. The fact he felt comfortable enough to believe he could even make such a statement to me, was one thing and finding out he was talking to the girl about it too was beyond me. There is something very wrong there and I worry about any young person who might be putting her faith in either of them.
One of the things that was interesting to me about this troll's comment was the references made about me, as a person diagnosed many years ago with MPDl They very much mirrored the sentiments in BG's email and in the personal message sent to me on FB by YW. Since this person doesn't even know me, I know she must be making her assumptions based on what she has been told and maybe upon a stereotypical perception of what MPD is. It certainly cannot be from what she read on either of my blogs.
I might add that stereotypical perception is very flawed. It might make good copy for soap operas and tv dramas but it is not what the behavior of the typical person with MPD is. I can assure you of that and in all of my life I have only ever been accused of being different people and forgetting things in this manner these three times. That should say plenty about its untruthfulness.
It was clear from the comment that the troll does not understand much of what she speaks about. Although I was accused of blaming and not taking personal responsibility, I know that nothing could be farther from the truth. I have been very careful to take full responsibility for my actions and I have not blamed others for theirs on both of my blogs and in my daily life. I may have relayed what their actions were so that others could make their own judgements but that is not blaming, holding accountable to some extent maybe, but not blaming.
I don't know if the troll doesn't understand what blaming and taking personal responsibility really mean or if she is just repeating something she has heard. Either way those statements were nothing but a manipulation of some very appropriate psycho talk to support a not so healthy perspective. Something I might add, that is very easily and commonly done by those who chose to exploit others. They know how to say all the right things, they just don't know how to live them.
This troll commented early on in this series of posts. I didn't address it until now because I hoped maybe she would follow along to see what really happened. I posted emails and BG's accounting in their entirety so it could not be said I edited them to manipulate the truth. The truth is right there in those posts and I have the hard copies of those documents to prove it. The owners of the two horses can easily be asked if they support my version of their transactions if one wonders about those things. There is plenty of evidence to support my claims on all counts.
There were those comments made about my training abilities and the inference I couldn't know what happened with Storm because I didn't see what they did. My training abilities I guess will speak for themselves over time. As for Storm I have repeatedly said I did not see him worked but that doesn't mean I can't tell what was done to him. All one has to do is look at the way he was moving to know that. Also I did have the benefit of seeing what was done with other horses to know what happened with Storm. Then there is the clinic I took the horse to so the training that had been done could be evaluated by Wendy Potts. It was pretty clear that she agreed with me the horse was very messed up. If Wendy Potts doesn't have the credentials to determine an improperly trained horse for this troll, then she is in big trouble.
I'm hoping with all this information the troll will question the two extremes between their story and mine. Maybe along the way she might pay attention to their behavior and the lies they so easily tell from very little things on up the line. Lying is second nature to them and it is something I abhor. It will be easy for her to see if she looks for it. Maybe she will be able to look outside their group for the impressions of others about me and my standards and ethics, not because I want her to trust me or support me, but because I hope she can learn not to blindly trust them. I know from personal experience placing blind trust in people who don't deserve it can get you into a lot of trouble.
With that being said I want to say I did not take anything this troll said personally. It was very easy for me to see that this information was more a repetition of something either overheard or said specifically to the troll than some conclusion drawn based on an interaction with me or anything read here or on my other blog.
That doesn't mean that I am not concerned that such untruths are being circulated. For those behind such malicious untruths, I do have recourse if they do not desist. I learned enough in my journey through the legal system to know how to deal with such slanderous and libelous activities AND I have no qualms about putting that knowledge to use.
I hope this is the END of this journey.
This is another picture of Scandalous Chance. This shot shows the animation in his canter. The first time I saw him canter his feet were over the top of his head he was so animated. I didn't know what to think of it. It took me a while to even figure out what I had been looking at was a canter at all. Truly an amazing horse, how I would love to see him reach his potential some day.
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It's my belief the story cannot be told without telling all aspects of it. From those things behind the scenes to those more obviously up front and in the open, all of the things related to the story exert pressure of some sort and add to the stress involved in living through such an event and recovering from it.
To understand what it was like to have lived this journey, I've tried to represent everything that affected me along the way.. There are a couple of things I am still struggling with whether I will post or not and I guess we'll just have to wait and see where I end up. For now the one piece of undisclosed information is that comment left by a troll on my other blog. The specific blog post, A Little Bit of Clarification was the place the comment was left but you'll see from it's content, it really address the story I was telling here about the lawsuit.
A comment such as this, I don't think really can just roll of the back of any reasonable person even though it's way off base. I'm posting it because it's affected me and in a way continues to affect me but I'm also posting it because there's something about anonymous comments being hidden away at the bottom of posts under a cloak of secrecy that seems to give some people nerve they otherwise wouldn't have. Putting their comment up front in a post directed straight at them seems to diffuse some of that power they think they have and make them feel just a little more vulnerable. To me that sounds like leveling the playing field a bit..........and believe me..........I'm all for that...........so here goes with the perspective of this troll...........
I have been following your blog for a while now and i've been keeping my mouth shut when it comes to your posts but i cant any longer...it seems that if your daughter really is the way you describe her as she learned it from you.... your whole blog blames someone else rather than yourself for any bad thing that has happened or is happening to you... as for your most recent post in your horse blog how can you blame someone for something that you weren't even there to see?! i think you need to learn to take responsibility in your own actions and decisions rather than blamin everything on other people....and have you even though about why your daughter or her children may of gotten the impression that you hate them? you sit there and trash talk them on your blog and make them out to be horrible people what kind of mother or grandmother would do that to her family...maybe you dont have a handle on your personalities because it seems there are hole in your storys that you just cant fill or your mind has decided to fill them with fiction and thing that didn't happen ... i've competed against your grandaughter and know of the barn you trash talk you make them out to be animals or monsters when in reality they are not its just what you see them as and you post it all over the internet how they have screwed you over but maybe you did it to yourself... you say you have a handle on your personalities but when you go from one to another in the middle of a situation and then write about it later and that isn't what happened or there are things you left out or missed is it just you lying or you getting old and losing your mind or is it you losing control... when your pushing a point or telling a story and not just one or two people are telling you your wrong but everyone involved is doing so maybe they aren't ganging up on you to make you the bad guy maybe your actually wrong...you talk like you know so much about horses and how they have to be taught to be able to compete in the shows and you trash talk every trainer you've been with why dont you just do it yourself and put your words into actions and save yourself the trouble and save everyone the headache and trouble from having to put up with you and listening to you do the "oh poor me" routine, it gets old.
I'm still digesting how I feel about this comment and all it's interesting little jabs. If you have thoughts about it feel free it express them.
The description of yesterday's picture was incorrect. That was Andy but he was out with his mother, Krugorrs Heiress. This is the picture of Andy visiting with Legs.
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While I usually only post horse related news to this blog, I thought this event deserved a mention. My oldest son, Bil, has a passion for volleyball as intense as my passion for horses. As I have embraced my passion, he has embraced his as well. While he's not been able to play volley ball professionally due to injury, he found a way to follow his dreams by coaching instead. As a firm believer that pursuing one's dreams is worthwhile, I am very pleased he has been able to find a way to incorporate living his passion into his life.
Over the weekend we received exciting news. Bil has just been hired by Seattle University as their assistant coach for volleyball. The press release of Bil's acceptance of the Seattle U position and subsequent resignation from his position as the Kentwood High School volley ball coach is here. It's a great overview of Bil's success as a high school volley ball coach. He was a force to be reckoned with on the high school scene for sure having been nationally ranked on several occasions. On the off season Bil has also coached for a private volleyball club and was equally successful there. I'm sure he'll be missed in that position as well.
Bil worked his way though college all the way to a master's degree in teaching for the sole purpose of pursuing his dream of one day coaching at the college level. He graduated this last summer and it only took the ink to dry on his diploma for the colleges to begin serious pursuit. How long it will take him to move on from an assistant to a head coach, only time will tell but you can bet he'll be chasing that dream with the same vengeance that I have chased mine.
Way to go, Bil!
Note: This picture is Andy visiting with his dad. As you can see Legs likes his babies, doesn't matter if they are girls or boys, if they come to visit, he loves loving on them.
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It was pretty quiet around here for Easter with Lindsay gone. We haven't had little kids or hunts for Easter baskets for years with our kids all grown but still Lindsay has a childlike wonder about her that spills over into all holidays and I miss her when she's gone.
Dave and I pretty much settled into our usual routine. He was out cleaning stalls while I got the fire going and the house warmed up for his return. With temperatures in the low 50s a small fire seems to be a must and I like to get it going good before I headed out to the barns.
We had this heavy drizzle coming down that made it too wet to ride so instead I did some work untangling manes. I'd planned to work on Trouble's mane while Dave fixed the mats in his stall but when I arrived Dave had turned Trouble loose and started without me. There was no way he was going to get caught just for me to untangle his mane. One step in his direction and he headed for the high hills.
Since Trouble wasn't cooperating I went back to the where I'd left on in my detangling mission. I was working on Scarlet's knotted mess of hair when I heard a commotion from out front. I figured it was Dave trying to catch Trouble but that turned out not to be the case. Once the mats were fixed Trouble decided he was fine with going back inside.
The culprit was Vee. I don't know if she got it in her head that Trouble had been out so it must be turnout time or what. Dave was cleaning her stall and hadn't totally blocked the door with the wheel barrow so Vee took the opportunity to squeeze her way free and make a run for it.
Dave went after her with halter and lead in hand and the mare scurried away. Just like Trouble had earlier, there was no way she was getting caught. Down the barn aisle she went, turning the corner to where the three gray mares live where she stopped and looked around. As soon as she realized there were no other horses out, she turned to Dave with a sigh to get her halter on and return to her stall.
All that drama had been for naught. I mean, heaven forbid Vee should be outside alone. The mare is a princess, you know, and needs her ladies in waiting and the rest of her court. What's the sense of being outside without your followers grovelling at your feet. Vee was having none of it........especially in the rain............
That was our excitement for the day other than finding fungus on MisScarlet's cheeks........
Hope you all got good stuff from the Easter Bunny, personally I was reallly wanting some chocolate marshmallow bunnies but I ate them before we ever got to Easter!
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It's been a long long day with Lindsay gone on vacation leaving Dave and I to tend the horses. I rode some, washed some, feed all, put in and blanketed some and wore myself down to a lump in a chair. Since my brain is mush, I'm going to cheat and post one of the humorous horsey things I've been sent. I hate to admit, I can't even remember where I got this. Maybe it was Scott Morris.........hmmm........I also hate to admit I can't even recall what they call this computer code short cut stuff......but it'll come to me........probably at 2 in the morning when I really want to be sleeping but in the meantime........enjoy a little laugh at our horsey selves.........
LAS - lost a shoe
BBM - ba-stard just bit me
FOMHL - fell off my horse laughing
FTC - forgot the carrots
MIHA - mare's in heat, again
IPTI - I'll pick up tennis instead
LWW - lesson went well
MSMBO - mud sucked my boot off
HSIH - horse snot in hair
HAO - hay all over
HIMB - hay in my BRA
PIHH - poop induced half halt
UD - unplanned dismount
PTTDG - prayed to the dirt god
MMM - master manure mucker
OOM - out of money
MHTS - more horses than sense
BAHHFDP - bought another horse husband filed divorce papers
GBBF - got board bill, fainted
GFBF - got farrier bill, fainted
HRHCF - husband realized horse costs, fainted
SLH - Smell like horse
DQFOY - Dressage Queen fell off - yipee
HTNHFH - hiding the new horse from hubby
WWFNS - will work for new saddle
AROGC - arena rained out - going crazy
SSB - saddle sore butt
BTLGR - b###hy trainer left - good riddance
ALIGAR - At least I got a ribbon
NLT - no lesson today
HGR - have a great ride!
FTMBA - foals take my breath away
HWNTTAAH - Honey, we need to talk about a horse
BHLATB - But honey look at the bloodlines
This picture is of course, the infamous twins. There were about three hours old in this picture. The one in the foreground facing the back wall is Trouble. The other would be Surprise. They were about fifty pounds each. Not bad for twins from a maiden mare. If you've never read their story, it was quite an interesting journey.
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Dandy has been the grumpy old man on my farm for quite a while now. I think the basis of his attitude around other horses began with his EPM as a youngster, Before he ever got diagnosed with the disease he began to get uncomfortable with traffic in the ring getting too close to him. I suspect this behavior was directly rooted in the fact he was not quite right because of that lesion on his spine. Feeling vulnerable the horse wanted strange horses to keep their distance.
As the pasture mates he grew up with gradually went their different ways, Dandy found himself with new pasture mates. The grumpy horse from the ring now appeared in the fieldin these new situatons. Dandy had no tolerance for this younger set. Going out with the other geldings who are all at least 15 years his juniors is not Dandy's idea of fun BUT it is much better than the other role he gets delegated to around here on occassion.
Being the only "old" gelding on the place make Dandy the number one candidate for baby sitter duties when it is time to wean colts. If I had a pair of colts in the same year, Dandy got a reprieve because I can count on the colts being colts to teach the little varmints something about herd dynamics. It is when I have a lone colt that needs a buddy that Dandy gets stuck with the job.
Dandy has always acted like he is put out by the role of babysitter. While he doesn't hurt the colts, he does teach them to respect his space. From the first moment a colt is turned loose in the same field with Dandy you can see his flattened ears and snaked neck as he shakes his head at the little monster laying the rules down right from the start. I always appreciate any time colts spend with Dandy because they certainly learn to follow as well as to pay attention and look for what's expected of them. He's a great teacher even if his demeanor always seems to be grumpy with any interactions with the colts.
I have never seen Dandy act anything but disgruntled about this role. He has not ever decided a colt was worth befriending. Instead he seems to tolerate them following him around with their funny hero worship kind of admiration just like the big brother forced to take the little brother outside to play. Dandy had done it because it was expected but he's most certainly not been happy about it.
With Tango now being a yearling, it was time to separate him from Dare. The last thing I needed was him breeding his sister when no one way looking and yearling colts have been known to do just that. That left Dandy as the reasonable surrogate much to his chagrin. Whenever the weather cooperates, Dandy and Tango have been turned out into the front field. That's the same field that Leg's stall opens into.
One day not too long ago I had taken Legs to the park to school and Dave and Lindsay had turned Tango and Dandy out in that front field. When I arrived home I asked Dave to help me keep Tango at bay so I could get Legs back into his stall.
Imagine my surprise when from out of nowhere I saw Dandy flying my direction with ears flattened and teeth bared diving straight towards Legs. Even twirling the end of the lead rope at him to keep him away wasn't working. Dandy was going after Legs with a vengenace I have never seen before.
Dave was oblivious to Dandy because he was so focused on Tango. That colt loves his dad and always wants to run up to meet him. On this day he was moving off as asked but clearly watching for an opening to make a break to visit Legs. Dave was so intent on keeping Tango off he could not see that Dandy was the real threat, nor would he have expected it.
For the first time in many years, Dandy was the horse with the attitude. Dandy was clearly defending Tango like Dare or Solidare would have done if they thought the colt was threatened. Only Dare or Solidare would have known that Legs is not a threat to Tango. He loves his kids, even the boys, until they get much older and decide to challenge him.
Dandy hasn't really been exposed to Legs in his stall face boxing with colts on the other side of the wall. All he could see on this day was a baby without a mother and the stallion getting too close. It was a role I never would have expected from any gelding, let alone this one.
I was afraid Dave might get kicked in the scuffle as I tried to protect Legs from the onslaught of fire breathing uncle Dandy. Yelling at Dave to get his attention while still maneuvering Legs so he didn't get attacked, I was caught in the middle. I was not worried about Dandy hurting me but he clearly was not responding to me trying to send him away. As long as Legs was in that field Dandy was going to get him. My concerns were for Legs.
I finally got Dave's attention and he was able to help ward Dandy off and Legs and I dashed for his stall. I struggled with the sliding door and silly Tango tried to sneak through into Legs' stall before us. I had to shoo the colt off before we could even get in the door. With Tango that close to Legs I could hear Dandy breaking past Dave just as we escaped into the safety of the stall.
I just turned Legs loose so I could focus on getting the door closed without Tango following us inside. I could only imagine how that might freak Dandy out. I managed to get the door closed right in Tango's face and Dandy wasn't far behind him. Once Legs was in the stall and the door was closed, Dandy was no longer worried about Legs. He pushed Tango away and the two went off to graze like a mare and a foal would.
It's a good thing that Legs is so comfortable with who he is. The stallion was not the least bit threatened by Dandy charging at him in that manner. He looked at Dandy the same way he looks at Storm when he challenges him in the trailer. The horse has this calm confidence that says he knows that he is "the man." He just is. He doesn't feel the need to defend that title. He just let me move him around where ever I wanted him as I tried to keep him away from Dandy. Without his cooperation there could have been a real wreck.
I have been bringing Legs into that field to go to his stall with mares turned out there for all of his life. He knows the routine and is always a prince. Whodda thunk, it was the twenty year old gelding baby sitting the yearling colt that would cause the problem.............certainly not me. Never in a million years could you have told me that Dandy would defend any upstart colt, let alone against Legs.
It'll be a long time before I get that picture of him diving at Legs out of my mind. It was as vicious as the look on Mark's face the day he attacked Scandalous. Of course, now that it's over, I can't help but chuckle just a bit when I think about it. That grumpy old man is nothing but a fake.................
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I've already told the stories that caused the issues with Louie because he was taken to two shows before he was ready. Had the horse made it into the ring at the first show he would have never gone to the second one.
It was when I got to see the horse in the ring at that second show that I was able to see the horse was not using his shoulder properly. Then once I rode him after regionals was over and BG was cancelling many of our work days I got the chance to really ride him myself. Then I could see the horse didn't really understand going into the bit properly either and that's why Louie had not maintained a proper frame in the ring. The horse didn't really understand despite the fact BG and WF had said he was ready to be shown.
From what I have been able to tell in the limited work the horse has had since that time, I'm not sure if Louie's forward has been compromised by gimmicking him into a frame with those apertures of BG's. The obvious issue with the horse is the nerves he gets when he's taken to a strange place. Unitl the weather clears up enough for me to expand my work day to include Louie, I won't be able to know if there are other issues there as well. For now I can say the thing with his nerves is serious enough it's going to take some time. Whether that's time off or time working, is unknown yet.
The next thing I'm concerned about has to do with two horses, Vee and Percy. When we originally began working with Vee, the mare was already started under saddle but had not been worked on a regular basis. She knew enough to walk, trot, canter and had a pretty good whoa. She did not know her leads and had a little trouble picking up the left one.
We had people coming to look at Vee and so BG decided he wanted to keep her there to spend extra time working on that lead. Now that I think of it, that's an interesting concept for a man that couldn't tell if he was on the right lead or not but still Vee stayed to be ridden by BG. Instead of getting better, Vee got worse.
By the time I quit taking Vee over to be worked the mare had a chronic issue picking up that left lead. We had gone from maybe missing it on the first request and getting it on the second to maybe not getting it at all with multiple requests. The only way I could get the correct lead at that point was to bring her out of a very small circle and up into it.
Percy was started by BG. While BG pushed him to hard that first day, he had backed up when I'd told him to. Percy really looked like he was coming along just like the others.
However, I noticed in January when BG all of a sudden decided he was working my horses again, that Percy was struggling with his leads to the same extent as Vee. Watching BG try over and over again to get that left lead, I decided I was going to get BG off of Percy before the problem got worse.
I have no idea what caused this problem but it's clear both horses have it. I have started a number of these horses under saddle and never had such a problem. Each horse that has started off with a difficult way had come around with no issues except for these two worked by BG. Maybe when I figure out how to fix this I will have some kind of clues as to what caused it. In the meantime, I have two horses that started off like any baby horse getting the correct lead and have not gotten chronic about getting the wrong lead to the left.
The last horse with issues related to the time with BG is Tag. He was the first of my young horses that BG started and it went the smoothest. Issues with Tag didn't really start until about the time MD and GD added their second horse at the barn and began with the cross ties.
It was during that same week that BG went to put the crupper on Tag and the horse freaked out. BG's way to handle this was to never use the crupper again. I also began to notice if we took any kind of break with Tag he freaked at having the pad placed on his back and then, of course, the saddle too. It would take a few days before Tag would get comfortable with being saddled again. Part of his freaking out was pulling back and since then if anything startles the horse he pulls back when tied.
It's important to note the issues this horse has are probably the simplest of all to fix. I began working Tag exclusively without any help from BG before we ever quit working together and I've not seen any sign of these things since the first days. I'll post about what I did to fix them in a later post.
To be continued.............
This is Scandalous Rhythm calling to his mom outside the ring. The horse got injured somehow having to do with this photo shoot
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Hope
I suppose the best way to start with the horses is to go through the list of horses that BG actually worked. Part of those horses he started under saddle with the aid of an assistant and part of them I started before they ever got to BG's facility.
The horses that were already started were Reflection, Hope and Vee. Although I had started all three of these horses at different times, they were at about the same point in their training. The horses started by BG were Tag, Percy and Louie. There are two other horses that were started by BG but those horses have very few rides on them, I will get to their stories as well but only after I have dealt with the issues of the other horses.
If you've been reading my blog for any length of time you know the story of my accident on Reflection. That happened with very few rides on the horse and it was a couple of months before I even got back to riding. I was scared enough by that incident to get some help and the horse went off to Amy for a couple of months. The plan had been for me to take lessons from Amy at one point to get my confidence back up so I could go back to training the horse again.
By the time the horse went to BG he had as much time on him as the other horses in this group and should have been safe to ride. However, when BG went to get on the horse it resulted in what he called Eight Second Rides Because I did not see this incident or any of those that followed I can only presume to guess what happened. All I know is that every time I questioned BG about Reflection, the horse was still unpredictable under saddle.
It wasn't until after I took Reflection home and was hauling him to BG's to be ridden that I got the opportunity to see what the problem was. Whenever BG rode Reflection he allowed the horse to swing his head from side to side. With this particular line of horses such behavior is really what I would call stallion behavior. The horse is tossing his head stating his intentions and flipping the rider off sometimes literally.
Who knows what would cause Reflection to leap or jump sideways but something wasn't to his liking and the horse would respond with very inappropriate movements. At times like these BG would begin frightenedly screaming "Whoa.........whoa.........whoa!" while grabbing at the horse hoping the horse would stop.
It was not a pretty sight and most certainly not an effective way to train a young stallion. By the time I actually saw this demonstration BG had been riding Reflection in this manner for months. Needless to say the horse has some pretty bad behavior that's been reinforced by BG's lack of knowledge in this area.
At this time I told BG he had to stop allowing the horse to swing his head from side to side whenever he felt like it. I had to explain to him why that was not appropriate behavior for a stallion and that the horse would never get fixed as long as he was being allowed to behave in that manner. I informed him he would no longer be able to ride Reflection if he allowed that behavior to continue.
This, of course, was after regionals and BG really was not doing much with my horses at that time. He was doing more cancelling than actual work days so Reflection didn't get ridden enough to fix the issue. I saw several more incidents where Reflection jumped or leapt sideways and BG screamed like a girl so it would be pretty safe to assume the problem still wasn't fixed.
In December of that year, I began working some of my horses myself at BG's facility. Reflection was one of those horses and I did ride him a number of times. The horse literally threw temper tantrums when I made him stop swinging his head from side to side and more than one time I ended up in the dirt.
On one of the occasions that BG stopped by the arena while I was working my horses, I told BG about the trouble I was having and insisted he spend some time helping me with Reflection The end result was BG worked him 6 times in December and then another 6 times in January before he decided he was no longer going to work horses for me.
Obviously that was not enough time to fix the problem he had created by allowing the horse to swing his head from side to side while being ridden. Before I can even begin to train Reflection for the show ring, I will have to fix this misbehavior that BG allowed for approximately 9 months.
It's not going to be an easy fix and it's really a shame. Reflection is not the kind of horse that likes to be in trouble. Had he every realized what he was doing was wrong he would have stopped. I swear I can yell at that horse and hurt his feelings. It wouldn't have taken much than firm scolding in the beginning to nip this behavior in the bud. Because the behavior was allowed, it's now a major problem.
Stallions, certainly my stallions anyway, will not tolerate what they believe is unfair. If you have allowed them to do something for so long they think it's normal behavior, then you take it away, they feel it is unfair. Treat them unfairly and they will fight. That's all there is to it. Reflections temper tantrums are his "fight" for the injustice he sees because suddenly he'd not being allowed to toss his head as he pleases.
What bothers me the most about this situation is what kind of horse trainer allows any horse, let alone at stallion, toss it's head from side to side while it's being ridden. For the life of me I cannot figure out what BG was thinking. Without a doubt I can say this problem was caused by BG's idea of horsemanship.
To be continued..................
More about the Horses....
This picture is Scandalous Hope with her mother, Lilly. This mare is affectionately known as the midget mare because she's not 14 hands but she has beautiful babies and they are always bigger than her.
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Part One
With the fate of the lawsuit decided everything about The New Journey been pretty much covered except for the status of the horses themselves with the exception of one other bit of information still left untold. I said right from the start that there were some things that might not look like they were a part of this story that did indeed have bearing on my journey through those months.
My readers may have wondered at times why I was including situations surrounding my relationship with MD and GD into this mix. Where those situations part of my personal journey? Of did they, indeed, have something to do with the situation with Storm? Certainly they were all wrapped up with WF and BG right smack dab in the middle but did they have anything directly to do with Storm?
MD claimed from the point that BG decided I was no longer welcome at their facility that she was not taking sides. Why she would even want to continue to do business with someone who was literally trying to steal a horse from me is beyond me but it seemed to make sense to her. I tried to give her the room to live her life on her terms so I left it alone.
She did say that she would testify in my behalf if need be but there were items among BG's claims that she seemed to support like that charge for a horse in a full care stall for 9 months. I had to assume because she hadn't been there much of the time she was remembering more along the lines of what BG said instead of what had actually happened. Her memory might just be BG's conversations about what happened instead of what really did. I was willing to give her that.
Still I found myself confused a lot of the time. It just seemed to me that we were growing farther and farther apart while they were growing closer and closer to BG and WF. Something about it just did not make sense to me especially knowing spending any time around BG is not good for the self esteem, not mine nor any of those kids. The man plays some pretty powerful head games and I saw enough evidence to know it affects everyone around him. It was a scary thought GD was living in their home on weekdays at the mercy of that kind of treatment.
As the stories of MD's behavior began to leak back to me through my friends who had found themselves in business transactions with her, I began to see that maybe MD had not experienced the personal growth I thought she had. Dramatic differences between her ethics and mine were beginning to show themselves and to be frank, really caught me off guard. None of this was what I expected from MD.
By the time it was discovered that she had forged a lease document to show a horse, I had to admit that MD's behavior more resembled that of WF and BG than anything she learned from me. Between that and the odd behavior of telling people I hated GD and other stories painting me as the bad guy with that relationship really got me wondering. Was this the behavior of an insecure teenager or was something more behind it? Considering MD's part in continuing those stories, what were they up to?
With all of these things and others I haven't even mentioned, I began to see that maybe, just maybe, MD was not the silent onlooker she pretended. There was the chance she was really a co-conspirator of sorts. Maybe she had not been responsible for the initial assault on my being but one of those sharks smelling blood and circling the water. Why would MD do such a thing?
I didn't really have to ask myself that question. I have known for much of her life. MD has always blamed someone, anyone, for her life not being what she's wanted and her primary target has usually been me. I thought there had been some healing between us. Now I found I must question that in a pretty big way.
I began to see the game that she'd played on me so many years ago only in a little bit different format. The assault she made on my heart in a suicide note saying she was doing this (attempting suicide) because she wanted to hurt me. There was no other explanation than she wanted to cause me pain.
Since then I have always known she was capable of inflicting such pain again. I knew right from the start she was capable of using her children as weapons against me. For some time I tried to protect myself from that possibility but I had opened the door when I tried to help my GD into the world of horses.
I had hoped that horses for her might be what they had meant to me. She had loved them so as a toddler. I thought that yearning would be as strong in her as it had been in me. I threw the door to my heart wide open in my attempts to help her find some comfort in her life but it was not to be. Who knows? Maybe GD could not see my vision because she had not come into this of her own accord but driven by the vengeance of her mother. I must consider that possibility.
Whatever the reason, GD had chosen to reject my attempts to share my world of horses with her. While MD first seemed interested in joining in that endeavor, she also rejected that relationship but joined BG and WF. Instead of horses becoming a healing thing between myself, MD and GD, somehow it had ended up as the horses being used against me as a weapon.
As the months passed on and the wounds piled up I found my one form of comfort was compromised. Every time I was around a horse, I thought about the pain of my relationship with MD and GD. Was that just something that happened? Or was it a deliberate, calculated plan of MD's?
Maybe I will never know the answer but I can tell you what I do know and then you can decide what you think. I know that shortly after I got Storm home, I had a friend ask me what I thought had/or would happen between WF and BG with MD and GD now that Storm had been returned to me?
I must admit it seemed like an odd question to me. Why would it matter that Storm had been returned? Knowing the answer to that question made her original question more understandable, "Well, they were partners on that horse."
My immediate response, "What do you mean? Who was partners on Storm" The answer, "MD and GD."
I will admit back when I first heard that MD had bought a partnership on a horse with BG, my second thought was about Storm. I dismissed that thought thinking it just didn't make sense or maybe I didn't want it to make sense. Whatever the reason, I dismissed it and barely gave it another thought until I was asked that question on this day after Storm was returned.
Now that the possibility of this betrayal was exposed, I just couldn't digest it. There was just not enough information there for me to compute this. I had to ask how my friend had come to this conclusion. The response I got was GD told her very excitedly several weeks before that they were partners on Storm. When the words fell from GD's mouth, immediately, MD joined the pair and shushed GD up. My friend had no doubt that MD did not want GD talking to her about it and the subject was dropped. BUT my friend heard from other friends of GD the very same thing. MD and GD bought into a partnership on Storm while we were involved in the lawsuit to get him back.
Looking back at some of their behavior, it actually makes sense in the context of this new discovery. If they wanted to justify why they would do such a thing as buy into a partnership on a horse that was gotten at my expense, portraying me as the bad guy would certainly be important. Still it makes me just shake my head in disbelief.
Was this as big a blow to my heart as that suicide note twenty something years ago? You're darn right. Has it changed me forever? Yes, that too. Is this the end of this story? Well, it's the end of a very long and difficult year and it's certainly the end of the story of Storm's time with BG and WF.
Where do we do from here? The story of Storm's return home is here.
Next I will post a brief accounting of the status of each horse that BG worked with during the course of our contract. Then I will begin posting about the rehabilitation of Storm and the other horses as those unfold. And I'm going to post the comment about this series and my relationship with MD and GD left by a troll on my other blog From there I'll be posting about the rest of my life with Arabian horses, something even these four people can not ever take away from me.
What do you think? Do you believe it? Or did you see it coming?
Let's Talk about the Horses.....
This picture is Scandalous Chase (the horse bought by YW) and his mother, Bey Aana who is Storm's mother. That makes this gelding a full brother to Storm.
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Part One
I must admit my trust was so fractured at this point, I really didn't trust the settlement offer. Being the first ones to sign that paperwork and then trust that BG and WF would sign it too screamed at my sensibilities. Only knowing that their attorney could be disbarred if the thing was not honored was enough to get me to sign on the appropriate line.
Dave and I signed those papers and then hand delivered them to their attorney's office where we got a copy signed by the receptionist verifying receipt. Even at that my stress did not subside, as I knew it wouldn't, I wasn't going to believe it until the horse was finally home.
It was not one of those things where the papers could be signed and the horse was ours. There was a process to it just like every thing else in this lawsuit. The processes of the law do not flow quickly. The date we were to receive the horse was Sept 15.
The papers had been signed on Sept 7 and the eight days in between seemed to pass at a snail's pace. For days we knew nothing. I had to be content to sit and wait and hope things went as planned. The whole time my stomach flipped and cramped. There was nothing to say the stress was over yet.
It was Sept 11 before we received the first communication from the attorney. The signed and executed agreement and the stipulation filed with the court were included along with a copy of a vet check and an estimated time for delivery on the 15th.
The vet check had been done to protect both parties from claims about the condition of the horse. However, there was a glitch as I saw it. I didn't think the check was done properly because the horse had not been checked for soundness. I knew they had received him in a sound condition and I wanted to be sure the horse was sound now.
Trying to get their attorney to understand that a horse not checked for soundness has not been properly vetted was an interesting task. All she knew was what BG told her. That was the check was done and the horse was fine despite his own remarks that suggested otherwise. I informed her there were no notations for soundness on the vet certificate and when I called the vet to ask they confirmed the horse had not had a soundness check.
I insisted soundness be determined and had to explain to the attorney why that was important to get it done. Once she realized that soundness is a pretty important standard in the industry she made sure that the horse was rechecked to determine soundness.
On the first vet check Storm had a small sarcoid removed from the edge of his right jowel. He had stitches and was on medication. In the paperwork, there was a comment saying "assume you will continue to give him his medications, if needed, and have his sutures removed" which I think was totally designed to be a jab at me and speaks to their "amicable" resolution.
The horse did get checked for soundness as I'd insisted and again BG said the horse was fine as did the letter sent by the attorney who was only listening to what BG said. This was despite notations by the vet Storm had distension in his hind fetlocks and hocks and he had flexed a 2 out of possible 5 on his right front with 0 being totally sound.
Dave and I talked about this situation because we could have cancelled the agreement because the horse was not sound according to the vet's own paperwork. Not being able to see the horse made it hard to know what to think. A 2 was not horrible but it could be only the tip of the iceberg or it could be nothing but a improperly done flexion. There was really no way to know without seeing him or having him examined by my own vet.
I made the decision I would go ahead and take delivery of the horse despite this situation because I wanted him out of there. Even if this did turn out to be something more serious and Storm turned out not to be useful for anything but a trail horse, I still wanted him here. I wanted Dave to know right up front what the possibilities were even if I planned to ignore the vet's findings and take delivery of the horse.
It would be important to note here, their lawyer made a notation in her letter that contents of the vet check were covered under the confidentiality agreement and as such should not be disclosed to anyone not party to the lawsuit. This is another one of those things that shows the woman knows nothing about horses or equine law because there is a section of law that states a settlement offer can not include anything that is not legal.
Since laws these days require full disclosure about lameness AND lameness history in the sale of horses, this report is not covered under the confidentiality clause because the horse was not sound despite what BG claims. The fact the horse had distention in his legs all the way past his hocks and flexed off on one leg are things that must be disclosed to prospective buyers not to mention my vet and farrier (and a trainer if I used one) who need the information to care for the horse properly. I have added both copies of the vet check and BG's emails to his attorney to Storm's file so the information is available if I need it.
What was important to me about this was BG's reaction in both cases. On the first vet check he made a comment to his attorney about the horse's edema in his legs and wrote it off to possibly being caused by confinement to the stall but he didn't have a soundness check done. Then in the second one with a flexion score of a 2 on one leg and detail about the distention in his legs, BG still says the horse is sound and flexed a score of 0 and ignores the information the vet provided.
Anyone who might have read all of this series and still thinks that BG is the horseman he claims might just want to consider his reaction to these vet checks before ever leaving a horse in his care. If the man doesn't think these things are issues, I feel for the horses in his care. For me it's just one more thing that says the man isn't honest and he sure isn't good for a horse.
To be continued.........................
The Ultimate Betrayal........
This is Scandalous Chance and his mother, KG Phadra Rose.
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Part One
For me the most important aspect in considering the decision about this settlement offer was always the horse. My concerns about his situation began not all that long after I'd traded him to BG and over time they just continued to grow. With a settlement offer on the table I found myself looking back at that history to aid in my decision.
Once I'd realized how WF was really taking care of her show horse I was very sorry I had made this deal. I was not happy I had put Storm into a situation where he would not see proper work, once his initial training was accomplished, or turnout. Most of his life would be spent standing in a stall or at the end of a lunge line if he was lucky enough to even be lunged on a regular basis.
Then as things progressed. I realized that Storm probably wasn't even getting proper training but being "trained" just by kids in the barn. Even if BG or WG was riding him at all there was nothing to suggest that would be adequate for what the young horse needed . WF's show horse does well to the regional level but his initial training was not done by WF. It was done by a very competent trainer who finished the horse properly. That was not what was happening with Storm. I was very worried for him and for my business. Here I had another super star type horse that wasn't going to shine in the ring. That wasn't good for Storm or for Legs.
I'd been told that once this question arose about Storm's ownership, the horse was not being worked at all. He just stood in his stall for weeks with no exercise. GD had asked if she could work the horse in the lines and been given permission to do that. How much of that was being done, I did not know. All I knew is that GD schools horses as she has been instructed by BG and that's just not adequate enough to finish any show horse, despite what they say. The way GD's own horse goes in the ring is proof of that.
The longer this thing drug on the longer he would be in their grasp. Although MD and GD had promised me they would let me know if the horse wanted for anything, I wasn't trusting that much at this point. As things had declined with them, I didn't know what to believe. Was the horse getting exercise on a regular basis or not? Was he being wormed and getting his feet done? I had no idea. All I knew was what to expect from past history will all of these people including MD and GD. That was enough to be unsettling. I wanted that horse out of there as quickly as possible.
In the beginning Dave was not so sure he wanted the horse back which was surprising to me because it had broke Dave's heart that I'd traded the horse. Now all he could see was how many horses we have and how much work it is. In his mind the last thing he thought we needed was one more horse adding more work no matter who that horse was. We were at odds.
Obviously that didn't stop me. When I get it in my head that something is right, then right will win out every time. I don't care about hard or inconvenient. Doing what's right is much more important to me and it seemed to me the right thing was to get that horse out of there.
I knew that Dave would come around if we got the horse back so I was willing to deal with him being mad. However, it didn't take long for BG's claims to make Dave so angry, I no longer had to worry about him being mad at me. Before we ever even got into the actual lawsuit, Dave and I were firmly on the same page. Getting Storm home was number one on our list.
Before I ever got on the phone with the attorney Dave and I had discussed in length the settlement and it's elements. We'd also discussed the likelihood we probably would never see any monetary compensation from BG or WF for damages. Both of us had been adamant we would not settle if the confidentiality clause was a glorified gag order designed to protect BG and WF. Now that I knew that wasn't the case, there seemed to be only one thing left to do.
Even though the settlement offer was nothing like it should have been considering the kind of damages done, there just seemed to be no point in proceeding further. If there wasn't much possibility of collecting on those damages, continuing would only drag out the stress, the expenses, continue to take my time from the horses, and leave Storm in that untenable situation longer. It just seemed to be better for us and our horses to take the deal and get Storm home.
Once the attorney had assured me the confidentiality clause only covered the actual settlement, I told him Dave and I would take the offer so we could get Storm out of there. We briefly went over the steps to get that done and I thanked him for his help. He told me he'd tallying up what he'd done and send me a bill. To date, I have seen no bill.
There was one thing that really frustrated me about signing this agreement. They were never going to get to see my case. All the work I had done that was now sitting on my dining room table was just begging to be sent to their attorney. I wanted them to know what I had against them. I wanted them to know I had done my homework and I was fully prepared to win in court.
To be continued...................
Little Glitches....
This is Scandalous Storm at about 6 weeks of age.
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Part One
I worried all week end long. What was the right thing to do for me and my business? Would sticking by my principles hurt my long term goals? If I held out for trial would it end up any differently other than a piece of paper in my favor? Should I just let go of this thing and get on with my life? Those and many other questions whirled around in my brain as I tried to make heads or tails out of the best thing to do.
At this point in time, we were now nearing the two year mark since Dave has been without a job. There was no way to think about this settlement offer without thinking about the possibilities of Dave's unemployment benefits running out and what that would mean. If ever I wanted a crystal ball to give me a glimpse of the future, I wanted it now. I wanted to make the absolute best decision for me, my family, my business and my horses and I had no idea what that was.
Knowing exactly how my attorney felt about my case might have eased the weekend's upheaval some. Because I hadn't spoken to the man since he got all my "stuff" I had no idea what his opinions of it were. All I could do was hope he believed in it's merits as strongly as I did but I must admit my insecurities were taking a toll on me. It was one thing to believe right should prevail and another to trust that would be the case. I rode that roller coaster all weekend long.
I know you've all been wanting to know what the attorney thought of how I'd prepared my case. I imagine the best way to answer that is just to tell you what happened next. You'll have to draw your conclusions as I drew mine.
I called his office first thing Tuesday morning only to get forwarded to his assistant. I remember my stomach rolling at the thought I would be leaving a message and guessing at what to do. Once I conveyed I had a settlement offer that needed to be answered that day, she patched me right through to my attorney.
When I heard his voice, the words began tumbling from my mouth, "I'm so sorry to be calling before you've had time to finish looking over everything I sent to you, but I have received a settlement offer and it needs to be answered today." The words almost choked me as they clamored to be heard. There was no relief in getting them out.....just a dread of what all this meant.
From the other end of the line, I heard laughing. That's right, laughing followed by, "That doesn't surprise me, MiKael. YOU are a defense attorney's worst nightmare." and more laughing, " Your attention to detail is the last thing any attorney on the other side wants to see." and more laughing followed by " Let's hear about your offer."
I must admit I didn't know what to think about that laughter at first. What did it mean? My brain was so muddled with the weekend's stress it just didn't compute. It wasn't until later I'd realized he laughed because he could see WHY they'd offered to settle at this point with only those admissions in their hands. He even made reference to them and how that attorney would want to monitor each and every answer trying to prevent them from incriminating themselves.
Still struggling trying to compute his frame of mind and that laughter, I blurted out the answer to his question about the offer. I told him I had emailed the paperwork to him so he could see it first hand. It's a good thing I had sent him the paperwork. I felt like I was about as effective talking at this point as I had been in court. The stress was palpable for me.
My attorney hadn't even logged on yet for the day, let alone opened any emails so he had no idea I'd sent him anything new. While he booted up his computer to retrieve my email, we talked a little bit about my case. I don't remember the exact content of our conversation but the gist of it began to calm my fears.
At this point the lawyer was no longer talking about IF you win. I could imagine with all that information he'd probably only been able to get an overview, yet the man was now saying WHEN you win without the slightest hesitation. Evidently he'd seen enough to understand how black and white the errors in BG's accounting sheet actually were. While I guessed he didn't have a complete grasp of the content of all that material, he'd come to believe the court wouldn't be able to miss the big picture either. There was no doubt he saw my case as rock solid and absolutely winnable. Something I definitely had not gotten from him or any of the other attorneys to whom I'd spoken before now. This new perception held some comfort for me although the looming decision still churned at my gut.
He made it very clear the big issue he could see was going to be about collecting on a judgement. He expected my damages to be well into six figures (which meant we would have to transfer the case to superior court among other things) but there was the very real possibility that I would never be able to collect a dime of it.
Even though it is possible to file liens years after judgments are made, with people as deceptive as BG and WF, the chances of ever pinning their assets down would definitely be an issue. I knew this about them before he ever brought it up. Now the fact he'd come to the same conclusion only made it clearer that might very well be the case.
Once he'd opened up the email documents I'd sent, we talked about the specifics of the settlement. While I was offended at their continuing claims of innocence he brushed it aside as typical. I realized as I listened, even with a judgement against them, BG and WF would still be claiming their innocence but that didn't make it so. It was important for me to remember nothing I did was going to make them take responsibility. It's not who they are. If that's what I was seeking, I just needed to let it go.
As far as the settlement was concerned, he did not try to pressure me in any way. As I'd expected he would do whatever I wanted. Most certainly he said it might not be worth the effort if I couldn't collect a judgement but if that's what I wanted he was in. He was willing for me to push for trial as long as I knew I would be taking my chances on collecting on any damages awarded in a judgement even though he was adamant I was entitled to every dime of a large settlement with all the damage that had been done.
Listening to him talk, it was clear that the best course of action would be taking the settlement but there was that confidentiality clause I was not comfortable with. I asked him specifically if it pertained just to the settlement or if it meant the entire case. At first he answered me like I wanted to push it to cover the whole case but I assured him that is not what I wanted at all. I wanted to be able to talk about all aspects of this case. Looking it over carefully he explained it was a poorly written offer and there were no provisions for non compliance of the confidentiality clause. Even if I didn't comply there was little they could do but sue me again. Even that would be pretty futile since there were no provisions for non compliance and establishing some kind of harm under these circumstances would be pretty difficult.
While that information was good to know for future reference it really wasn't my issue with that clause. His answer to my specific issue, once he understood it, was as I expected. The way the confidentiality clause was written specifically stated the settlement. He told me if sometime in the future I wanted to write about my experience and this lawsuit, I was certainly at liberty to do so. The big question was where did I go from here?
To be continued...........................
The Motivating Factor in the Decision.....
This is Aana with her foal, Patriot. This is the first time I ever caught Aana in the process of foaling. Doing so definitely made her more comfortable with me being around he foal. Although when it was all said and done he was still nearly as aloof as the rest of her foals. Those genes sure do play a role in that too.
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Part One
That Friday night I read the letter and the settlement offer from BG and WF's attorney over and over. I read it silently. I read it out loud. I read parts of it to friends. Everyone I shared it with thought I should jump at it but that's not how I saw it.
The only good thing about it as far as I was concerned was that I got my horse back. The rest of it was just a bunch of legalese designed to make them look good and to put an end to this thing without costing them anymore than they'd already paid.
By now I had a real sense of what my relationship with BG and WF had cost me, my family, my business and my horses. I knew enough to believe if it was possible to go back and do the whole thing over, I would not. It would never even have been a consideration knowing what I know now. All this thing did was cost me, period.
It had cost me and my business two years of my life, two years of my horses lives too. Not only were the horses two years older, the ones he had worked with were no longer clean slates. I had wanted horses safe to ride and what I got were horses with issues. We had gone backwards, not forward. That 20/20 vision of hindsight had changed my view of BG and his talents. My horses clearly reflected the new perspective. I was left with the mess to clean up from the damage he had done and I was just angry enough to want to see that he paid for what he'd done to my dream. The real question was that even possible.
Looking at this settlement offer, I knew what I would do had I not had a lawyer at this point. I would have countered this offer. I wanted BG and WF to take some form of responsibility for messing with me and my herd. I would have been willing to take the risk they might decline and we'd go to trial. For me, a decision made in court would mean definite vindication. There would be no BS claiming they were in the right in the legal documents. There would be a judgement according to the law.
At this point with my realization that BG's own accounting sheet disputed his claims, I was very comfortable that I could win at trial. All those warnings that court is unpredictable just didn't seem realistic considering how poorly WF and BG had concocted their story. By now I was clearly seeing the visual aids it would take for the court to easily get the picture I saw. I knew I could create them from my evidence and I was willing to take the risk I would win at trial.
The only problem with that was that I now had the attorney in my corner. While his expertise was much welcomed, it changed things now with a settlement offer on the table. Any kind of counter that might have been palatable to them would be devoured by attorney's fees so there was no point.
Also, I had to consider the possibilities of never being able to collect damages even with a judgement and the new element of attorneys fees. While getting a judgement complete with damages might sound good, collecting on it could definitely be something else. If I couldn't collect from BG and WF, I needed to be prepared to be coming up with attorney fees myself. Although I already knew my attorney was prepared to work with me on how I got that done, I needed to be aware of how long that obligation might be hanging over my head and how stressful that might be as well.
Even considering that, there was one very big stumbling block for me in this settlement offer. A confidentiality agreement was included as part of the settlement. The way I read the clause it was about the actual settlement agreement. However, if there was any room what so ever that it could spill over into the other details of this case, I was not interested. It was a matter of principle to me that I be able to talk about what BG and WF did in this case. I would take whatever risks I must not to be bound to secrecy about this whole mess. They'd been telling their side of the story for months and I wasn't going to be deprived of telling mine.
I scanned the settlement offer into a pdf file and sent it off in an email to my attorney. I explained my concerns to him and waited for the weekend to end so I could consult with "my legal counsel" before I made my decision. I already knew from this man that he would be ok with me continuing on principle because so far that's all he'd been able to see was my principles and that's why he'd taken my case. If I wanted to continue on despite the settlement offer, I expected it would not change his offer of help one iota.
I knew the attorney would explain to me there is a court rule that says if a settlement offer is declined, even if that party wins at trial, they must pay attorneys fees for the losing side if the final order does not exceed the amount of the offer. I had no fear of this clause because it was clear with damages I would have no problem satisfying that requirement.
While at this time I didn't know how to compute the damages to my business and my horses, I was confident that my equine attorney knew exactly how to go about getting those numbers and substantiating them for the court. Getting a larger settlement from the court than their offer would be easy enough on damages alone without even considering the triple damages for fraud and unfair business practices. I had more than enough evidence to easily prove both of those causes of action as well as the others I had to file in my amended complaint.
It wasn't until late Sunday that I realized it was Labor Day weekend. Then I was a bit panicked about this whole situation because I had thought I had two days to touch bases with my attorney. I knew having only one business day to make contact with him could be difficult. I had my mind made up if I did not have his input about the confidentiality clause, I would turn down their settlement offer.
As the time ticked away, I found myself continuing to read that letter over and over again. Doing so fueled the fire driving me to hold BG and WF accountable for what they did. I knew the clause "my clients will have to pursue their own discovery requests, responding to yours, and additional costs will be incurred which will of course be avoided if the case settles........" was designed to intimidate me so that I would settle but if their attorney thought the idea of them making discovery requests scared me, she couldn't be more wrong. Once we were locked into the discovery process, there wasn't anything that would give me more pleasure that finally showing my hand. I was actually looking forward to it.
To be continued..................
A Little Expert Perspective....
This little tank is Scandalous Legend. At the time this pic was taken he was just about a month old, if you can believe that. That white in his nostrils isn't a marking, it's milk.
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Part One
So there it was staring up at me, another one of those envelopes from BG and WF's attorney. Dave had come straight to me when he'd retrieved this thing from the mailbox. Even though it's addressed to both of us, he would never think of opening it. This thing was mine to deal with....... whatever it was.
Dread filled my heart as I stared at the manila envelope in my hand. It was easier to look at it and speculate than open the thing. So much of my heart was wrapped up in this case, anything new from them felt like an assault on my very being. No matter how prepared I was, their denials and counterclaims felt like a huge burden weighing heavily upon me.
I had an idea in my mind at where I was in this process. I figured right from the start I was going to have to put enough pressure on WF for her to realize it was going to cost her to get my horse. Only if she knew she really had to pay what the horse was worth, would she back off. This had been, after all, about getting something for nothing, or nothing to her anyway. BG has been the one doing the work, what work there was done.
To my way of thinking, I had not done that yet. I expected we would not reach that point until they had my discovery in their hands. Only when they knew I was prepared and really had a case I could prove would they do the right thing. I figured once their attorney got the chance to look over all of the material, that my attorney was now studying, would she understand the magnitude of this case. Then I expected things would change, but not until then.
That left this envelope screaming at me. It must be their discovery requests, or maybe something resulting from that phone conference with the judge which would still be discovery related. I could deal with that. I just didn't want anymore curve balls thrown my way.
I took a deep breath, braced myself and opened the envelope. I was not prepared for what I read. "I write to propose an immediate settlement of all claims outstanding in the above case."
Scanning down the page I read the expected disclaimer "While my clients continue to dispute that you are entitled to the horse, and you have admitted to receiving the boxer puppy and several thousand dollars worth of services from BG for which my clients will receive nothing if they give the horse back to you, they desire an amicable resolution rather than protracted litigation.
While my clients are confident they would succeed in their claims and defenses, I assume you have the same confidence in your position. We will most likely have to go to trail to resolve the outstanding issues and there is risk to all parties in proceeding further. For you, as plaintiffs, if my clients succeed, they have requested their attorney's fees.
I understand you claim that you have been damaged monetarily, but return of the horse should be more than sufficient as a compromise of that claim.
Please give this settlement proposal your immediate consideration and communicate your acceptance, or rejection, by phone to myself, at ---, or in writing to my office on or before close of business on September 7, 2010 After that time my clients will have to pursue their own discovery requests, responding to yours, and additional costs will be incurred which will of course be avoided if the case settles........"
There it was including all the usual BS. I can't even tell you how many buttons all that manipulative bunk pushed for me. If they wanted me to relax, all they did was fire me up. As long as they continued to take no responsibility for their actions, I wasn't buying anything they had to say.
Then there was that deadline, just one more manipulation. The letter arrived late Friday afternoon and the deadline was for the following Tuesday. It didn't even dawn on me until Sunday that Monday was a holiday and they had given me exactly ONE business day to respond. How's that for sincere and amicable?
To be continued................
A Little Weekend Stewing...
This is another picture of Reflection. Looking at it, I should probably be running some kind of a contest for a caption. Maybe I will save that for another day.
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Part One
I must admit I did a better job of sending everything for my case to the equine attorney than I did posting about the process here. I left out of my post some components that were pretty important to the case.
Of those items I forgot to mention were the facts my new friend had turned up in her search of public records. There was BG's arrest and the quit claim of that house from WF to her son in the fall of 2009. Also there was the information on the legal owner of the property that is the facility of BG and WF.
I also sent the man a detailed witness list. It included not only the three friends who knew my story right from the start but there were an assortment of others on there as well. I sent him contact information for each person along with specifically what pertinent information each person knew that affected this case.
I also addressed the matter of witnesses for BG and WF. I compiled a list of people I thought could possibly appear on their behalf. For each person I named there, I told him how they were connected to the pair and anything to discredit them I might know.
Of course on the subject of witnesses, I knew I must address the situation with MD and GD. While they had told me they would testify in my behalf, their behavior seemed to suggest otherwise so I made sure the attorney knew that each of them could turn out to be hostile witnesses. Just in case that happened, I armed him with the information he would need to impeach any lies told by them as well.
Sending off all of this information to the equine attorney really did make things clearer for me. As I worked through trying to present it to him in a way that wouldn't confuse him, I began to see how even the smallest pieces of evidence fell into place in the puzzle of this case.
I knew it would take more than a couple of days for this attorney to make heads or tails out of all this stuff so I focused on working with what I had here. Armed with this new awareness of how these pieces fit, I began to work on putting all of these hard copies into the format required for the court.
I'd known for sometime each item must be marked as an exhibit. With as many exhibits as I had I thought it was important to assemble them in a manner that flowed with the story as well as having easy access for later reference since there was evidence there that would need to be verified by witnesses and such too.
I also began working on some graphs to show BG's figures next to mine. Nothing would be more dramatic than to see those stark lines running across white paper indicating the highs and lows of the two stories told. Then BG's accounting stacked up next to all my evidence should make short work of the court being able to see which story was supported and which wasn't.
I'm not going to tell you I was getting more confident at this point but I was beginning to feel at least prepared. I still didn't know what to expect but at least I knew whatever came my way I would be ready for it. I tried to be patient as I waited for my attorney to get a good enough grip on the information that we'd be ready to make some kind of decisions about how to proceed.
The couple of days turned into more like a week and I hadn't heard anything from the man. We were going into the labor day weekend. although to be honest that hadn't dawned on me yet. All I knew was the weekend was coming and I hoped he'd be ready to talk to me after it weekend was over. In the meantime I was hoping to give myself a short break and relax through the weekend. That is until Dave picked up the mail.............
To be continued.........................
So What's This?
This foal is Scandalous Reflection and these pictures were taken when he was a little over a week old. I'm not sure he knew quite what to think of Mary Little jumping around in her "bear" suit but he studies her pretty diligently.
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