Friday, February 4, 2011

The New Journey Begins........Subtle Changes.....

Part One

Once BG and WF had the horse's papers in their possession, the plans for the Arabian stallion almost immediately began to change. The next thing I knew, WF had decided she didn't want to show the horse as a hunter. She was going to wait until he was ready to go western.

Plans to take Storm to Daffodil were done. The Arabian stallion couldn't possibly be ready because the horse not only needed to go slow, he needed to be in the curb bit because of his age. There were no immediate plans for other shows either. For all intents and purposes planning to show Storm for 2009 was officially over regardless of the fact showing the horse in 2009 was a part of our contract.

I mentioned to BG about getting the papers back a few times. I was told they couldn't make up their minds whose name the horse would be in so they hadn't been signed. I thought that didn't really matter because I'd been told they were husband and wife and that fits the guidelines for close relatives in the rules but the papers still weren't returned to me.

Now that they no longer had immediate plans to show the horse they could put off resolving their conflict of whose name the horse would be in until they were ready to show. In the meantime they had no concerns or thoughts about returning those papers to me. I was also getting a very uneasy feeling about things happening at the barn. I actually began to wonder if I was going to get the work I was due for this horse they now had in their possession.

All this while I began to see other things happening around me at the barn. As they piled up my discomfort began to grow. There were subtle indications that maybe I was no longer a priority in the barn and there were things that said maybe I'd not done right by this horse.

The most obvious was concerning GD and MD. GD was at the barn more and more when I was there working horses. I was spending enough time there it was hard to avoid her or MD. There had been some issues with my horses when they were around and BG didn't seem to care one way or the other even though he had promised that he would.

What had happened to my comfort being more important than another training horse? Well partially that had probably changed because by this point GD now had two horses at the barn. The second one, also a registered half-Arabian mare, was on lease (or so I was told) to her from yet another friend of mine. That mare had issues as well so GD needed BG's help on that mare too.

When talk of bringing that mare had first started, I'd tried to talk MD out of leasing the mare. I was afraid that they were getting in over their heads going from one horse to two so quickly not to mention with both horse's having issues. I thought it would be best if they paid for one before moving onto another, even for a lease. I was told that MD was not involved in it at all, GD had made this deal and that's just how it was, MD was going to let her do what she wanted.

Next thing I knew that mare was moved in at BG's barn and MD and GD now had two horses in training there. Not only that but GD was now living with WF and BG. She goes to school via the computer and she was spending her weekdays living with them and from what I could tell now working for BG.

Even with this new change in their relationship if there was any kind of problem with my horses and MD was around BG was quick to blame MD for whatever happened. He even blamed MD for an incident where Tag freaked out in the cross ties and nearly flipped over. BG wanted me to believe MD was at fault and he spent considerable time trying to convince me of that.

I didn't see what caused the wreck only the outcome but I did see that both BG and MD were in the vicinity. From that day forward the horse had major issues not only in the cross ties, he also began freaking out about being saddled too. Whatever happened, the horse had been startled and his confidence in the cross ties was shattered.

BG was equally as quick to try and involve GD with my horses until I once again reminded him that I wouldn't have it. Still he would ask me to relay information to GD for him and it almost always ended in a disagreement between her and me. I just couldn't say anything horse related to her without her arguing but he still kept trying to push me at her.

It was difficult to stay out of the position of having to talk to my GD. Whatever communications were involved, I still was met with the same old attitude. If I said black, the girl said white and her mother was much the same. Nothing had changed that would make me think I could trust GD with my horses.

Only by now what had changed was BG didn't really care if there was a problem between us. He no longer instructed GD to be respectful and he no longer worked at making sure GD knew he respected me as a horse person or that there were similarities in our thinking. The only thing I remember him saying to GD about me at this time was that he would never presume to try and give me a lesson on a horse or tell me how to ride.

There was a shift going on in the barn. While I couldn't really put my finger on it at the time I could feel the pressure. The barn was becoming an uncomfortable place to be.

To be continued............................

Going into Show Season

I would like to thank Show in Style and Wet Reins for awarding me the Stylish Blogger Award which I have already posted. I appreciate these bloggers thinking of me despite my dress code.

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  1. How sad that your GD was brought in on this, too. I can't even imagine how negative the atmosphere at that barn must have been for you. I cringe to think of it.

  2. Now that BG has the papers and the horse and your GD living with them. Boarding two horses, training them etc. You are on the back burner. He's working the angles and making money. Not only is he a dishonest person but he is an instigator where your GD and daughter are concerned.

    It seems he was causing more trouble in your family that may have been easier to overcome without him in the middle. Given time tensions usually burn out and difficulties can be worked out, I think he kept fueling the fire. For his own purposes.

    It's too bad you had to go through this. And it's even worse that there are people like this in business with followers. I won't say I can't believe they were fudging around with the papers and decided not to go to any shows as the contract stated. Of course they did, their whole purpose from the beginning was to get possession of that horse. What a couple of ...,(sorry can't put any words in here to describe them, I'd be thrown off the internet).

  3. Linda, I suspect there will be lots of cringing before this story is finished. This is really only the tip of the iceberg.

    Arlene, You're right on the mark. I wish I could have seen it at the time but then there are lots of aspects to this I didn't see and they are not just on the part of BG or WF.

  4. Manipulative B******.You DO NOT MESS WITH PEOPLE"S family!!! I would not be able to forgive the lies and deceit with the horse but to play your family against you argh!!!

  5. fern, I said from the start MD and GD were wrapped up tightly in this mess and believe me they are...all the way to the end.

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  7. What an aweful situation for you!

  8. Relationships are so difficult to understand sometimes. It must have been very hard meeting them at the barn and disappointing to see the direction everything was going.

  9. sally, it was awkward, that's for sure.

    FV, at this point, it was really very confusing. I don't know that I understood how BG was stirring the pot. I just knew things were uncomfortable and not getting better but what was happening between MD, GD and me really didn't make sense. I suppose on some level I was thinking things between us who somehow work out.

  10. I can almost feel the change in the air now that they have the papers and can imagine your concern. Even though we know how it turns out, I hate to see where it goes until then....

    Re your comment on my blog with regards to gooseneck trailers & short box trucks... It is a concern but if the distance between the front of the trailer & your back window is a few inches more than the distance from the middle of the trailer to the outside edge, you are golden (I think! :) It is with the true "short" boxes that cause the most concern.

    I deleted the post about truck shopping. A friend reminded me that with the oil prices rising, there will once again be a surplus of heavier trucks come summer. I may want to hold off when supply is heavier and there is less demand. I think he is right.

  11. I'm curious as to what benefit BG got by keeping animosity between you, MD and GD. Also, it seems counterproductive to everyone to not show Storm. BG could get bragging rights for what a "great trainer" he is.

  12. Ms Martyr, I think you'll see the benefits as the story continues.

    As for showing Storm, I don't think that BG really had any say in whether Storm was shown or not. That was WF's call and she really doesn't like to show hunter. Once they had possession of the papers, I think she felt under no obligation to do what she had promised. Even if BG had wanted the horse in the ring, I doubt she would have done it just for him.

  13. Sounds like a steep slide down from here on out. I bet you were second guessing yourself wondering if you were being paranoid at the time. I would have done that, too. But your self-conscious was certainly sensing something foreboding on the horizon.....


  14. Lisa, you're probably right about the sub-conscious level. I would get these little twinges and then get so side tracked into the work or tring to get it done that I would forget about them though.

    One thing here and another there, I just wasn't putting them all together yet. I have to say that when I did, I felt like I'd been really stupid. It's not been easy trying to work my way through this nightmare.