Saturday, February 12, 2011

The Fork in the Road...........

Part One

My blog posts directly to the "notes" on my FaceBook. Exactly how long after I post to Blogger before it gets updated to FB, I don't really know. Sometimes it takes longer than others and sometimes it's downright quick.

All I know is that on January 16, 2010 it was just before 11 pm when I got an email from FaceBook notifying me of a comment made on my post. This comment read,

Hey MiKael read what you had to say. But dont forget 'BG' has had some health issues and family business to take care of. As for not working the normal amout of horses he used to work well 5 horses a day compared to last year of 9. Umm ...I guess it comes down to also having horses at to home to work also. Plus we dont have any grooms working here. That makes for a full day! WF

Not like there wasn't enough information in that to get me going, this comment was followed by two others. The first by another blogger I had met who had met BG actually through me. They had become quite "tight" in the last few months and he was definitely spending much of his time with her and her daughter instead of doing the work he should have been doing for me. Her comment read

The last part of 2009 was hard on just about everyone. It sounds to me like you and BG both did all that you could. I would appreciate that fact that something was done versus nothing at all, instead of complaining. We all do the best we can but we just can't please everybody.

As if that comment wasn't enough it was followed by one from PF, that woman who had joined YW in ambushing me. Her comment was short and too the point but clearly said the woman once again smelled blood in the water. It read,

Well said WF.....=)

So there it was, right there in front of me on my FaceBook page. Not only was there the claim that BG did more work than he actually did but there was a surprising show of support from two people who knew nothing of the circumstances.

The "look" of this was not good for me or even for them. I thought I would give them the benefit of the doubt and address what had been said.

I posted my own comment addressing each person beginning with WF. Basically I told her she misunderstood the meaning of my post. It had not been about pointing a finger at BG for not working horses, but about the horses themselves. The post was not really about what either of us had done with them. it was about where the horses were in their training. I did add that BG had never worked 9 horses for me, that I had been doing part of the work.

This particular blogger is known for over reacting and reading condemnations into things that are not there. I have known this about her nearly since I first encountered her blog. I really like this woman and believe she lives in a difficult place always believing others are seeing the worst in her when that's rarely the case. For this blogger I tried to tell her she was reading something into my post that was not there and I tried to do it in a way that was supportive.

The woman behind the third comment I still do not get. Why is she so vested in attacking me when she doesn't even know me? For her i thought a lot about exactly what I should say and to be truthful I don't remember all of it but I did suggest maybe she should learn the facts before she decided to get on the band wagon taking sides. Otherwise she might just find herself attacking someone who didn't have it coming one of these days.

It didn't take long for me to have answers to my comment.

Maybe you need to do the math MiKael. I recall 3 loads a day foe quite sometime last year. And that when BG was boxing legs. As far as having nothing to do with you. You are the one posting this information. I figure that everytime he touches a horse, it counts WF

Followed by this comment for the blogger who was not at the barn until around late spring or summer.

MiKael, whether or not you intended this to be a complaint, that IS how it comes across. I'm not reading anything more that just the words on the page and that's the take those words gave me. He has helped you a HUGE amount in the last year or so and your posts don't reflect that, at least not very often. Maybe you should take a different approach to your writings in the future.

Of course, there was PF joining in too. I'm not going to post her complete answer but basically she claimed she didn't really need to know the details. All she was doing was being supportive of WF being assertive. Then she pretty much said I was the one who had posted this in a public forum and I should be prepared for the heat.

I looked at this mess on my FB page which is really only there to promote the horses and I thought this is really not the place to be dealing with this. Still all this stuff was whirling around in my head from 9 horses a day "most" of the time to "every horse he touches counts" coming from a woman who was not even home when most of the work got done. Still I knew enough to know that SHE was the one adding Legs into the mix and I was pretty sure it wasn't going to stop there.

I should probably mention that same comment "every time he touches a horse, it counts." had been made by WF at the barn Christmas party just a couple of weeks before. It is the first time I heard that comment and I remember a little "oh, oh" resonating in my brain. Now added in with this claim of 9 horses throughout most of the previous winter, I could see exactly where this was going and it wasn't going to be pretty.

It was also easy to see a woman I thought was my friend was taking sides in something she really knew nothing about. From her wording it is obvious she believed that BG was "helping" me. I wonder how she would have felt had she paid for that much work and got the kind of "help" as she calls it, that I did. I'll bet she'd think all that help wasn't really nearly as much as it should have been for paid training of 5 horses 5 days a week. Although I do think it is interesting that she made mention of what I wasn't posting on my blog when she'd been telling me she hadn't actually read my blog in months since she had no internet.

I didn't need a baseball bat to hit me squarely between the eyes to know where this was going and I wasn't going to have it happening in a public forum. I deleted all the comments off my FB page and I deleted all three parties off my friends list so they could not repost them. Then I sat back and waited for the fallout.

To be continued.............

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  1. Since they apparently read this blog I'm going to address this comment to them:

    Remember that like attracts like, negativity, finger pointing and misunderstandings only beget more of the same. It also makes you look childish and petty.

  2. Seems like a lot of people who knew nothing of what was actually going on had a lot of opinions about your business dealings with these two very dishonest people.

    WF was setting you up in writing mentioning how many horses were worked etc. I'm sure they had something cooking on the back burner and it sure wasn't going to be to your benefit or Storm's. Just my opinion.

  3. smazourek, thanks, I appreciate the sentiment.

    Arlene, I believe you are right. I felt like I couldn't avoid dealing with the subject. It was not true and to not say anything would look like I agreed.

  4. NIce group! NOT tried and convicted in the court of public opinion ,my goodness, sounds like WF was spoiling for a fight and had all the details prepared. Next thing she suggested was that Storm was all but paid off , due to the 9 horses he "touched " per day?
    These people sound more and more like a gang of charlatans and thieves . Rather than use the skills they may or may not have and do the work , they seem to prefer to use "smoke and mirrors" to further their own schemes. I can only hope that you writing about this helps to heal you and possibly warn others about people of this ilk

  5. fern, that's pretty much how I felt at the time and it made me wonder what BG asking me to post about those few days of work had been about.

  6. I could touch 9 horses in 9 seconds if they were all lined up in stalls. I'm sure your intent was to have your horses benefit from the "touching" so that they were safe to ride. The drunk down the street slapped my horse when he bit him. That qualifies as touching.

  7. If "touching" a horse meant working a horse, none of us would get trained horses at the end of 30-60 days. My trainer never considered it a day on a horse unless she'd groomed it, tacked it, tied it, rode and worked it for at least an hour (unless they went on the trail or to the ranch), tied it back up, unsaddled, washed it off, groomed it again and eventually returned it to its stall after a full day. That was considered ONE ride, even though the horse was being trained in one way or another for five hours or so.

  8. Nuzz Muzz, you make a good point. Considering that some of these horses were not touched at all by BG. This comment was not really about touching. It seemed to be about being on their property. Although I'm sure her argument would be it didn't matter if I had done any of the work, BG would get all the credit. Something I had certainly never agreed to, nor had it even been discussed. I was willing for BG to get credit for the work he had done but certainly not for the work I had done.

    Linda, sounds like you have a trainer who puts the time in. That's good. There are lots that don't unfortunately.

  9. i'm confused. did they really think that 5 horses were getting worked 5 days a week as agreed? it seems like they are confident about that, but yet admit that things are busy and you should be thankful for what you get (shakes head). the other people who think you didn't appreciate him probably didn't understand the terms of the contract, and the "fee" (storm) which he'd already been paid.

    to be told to be more understanding because things come up, well he'd already calculated that he would be working for you through 2010, even if things did not come up.

    and all the while the clock is ticking for getting the horses into the showring.

    by "touch a horse" i assume he meant lunging or groundwork. but i was under the impression that you were not asking him to help you with legs, but that richard wanted to do it anyway. legs was outside of the realm of the contract because legs was not a youngster becoming greenbroke by richard.

  10. lytha, trying to figure out what they were thinking will probably get more confusing as we go along. All I can tell you is what I know.

    It sounds to me like you are doing a good job of keeping the facts straight as I have presented them so you have as much to go on at this point as I had.

  11. Oh, I see how twisted this all is, he lets you use his facility cause you are "friends", proceeds to flatter you, treat you like a queen and says whatever is necessary to induce you to believe that you all are on the same page on how to handle horses. Doing just enough work to build your trust and confidence. Because you are now ripe for the plucking, he asks for the papers. You are savvy enough to regret signing them when you see the look in his eye. Sure enough, you are no longer "the Queen" but a nearly plucked peach. (he's counting his chicks before they are hatched).
    Who knows what lies he's told these other women, but he's happy to let them do his dirty work for him, I suspect hoping you will fold, just give up and walk away. He didn't know you have a rod of steel down your back!! And a very powerful dream tempering that steel!!
    But really Mikael, (heavy sarcasm here)'friends don't charge friends' and he's letting you work N I N E horses at his facility, and he's so very amazing that really I just can't understand why you won't just give him your $30,000 horse?!?!?!
    So then what? He goes to all this trouble to scam you out of your horse, can't even bother to get him trained properly or to a show, how's Storm going to be worth $30,000 to him? Naw, he'd just talk crap about the horse, you and your breeding program, justifying his bad behavior never taking responsibility. Looks to me like his train ran smack dab into a wall!! . . . named MiKael Caillier!!
    Good, because I bet he's left a long line of destruction behind him.

  12. dinkleberries, sounds to me like you are also doing a good job of keeping the facts straight and you are reading between the lines pretty well.

    Of course, his version of the story will be much different than this and it will all come down to he said, she said and who people chose to believe.

  13. Just to play devil's advocate I can understand why WF would rush to BG's defense, being his girlfriend and all. Some people are blind to the defects of those they love, until breakup time when all those faults suddenly become glaringly clear.
    I disagree that your initial comment sounded like an attack on BG. It was just a statement of fact.
    Are these people really still reading your blog? If so, they will finally be getting, to quote Paul Harvey, "the rest of the story."

  14. Ms Martyr, there are those connected to them reading this blog and my other blog as well. Whether they are reading it first hand or getting information, I don't know. I did get a comment from what some would call a troll. It was on the other blog but made references to what I'm posting here and what a "liar and/or crazy person" I am.

  15. i'm just catching up, and i admit a bias here because i only know you through your blog and comments, and i don't know anyone else at all. but there was one bit that caught my eye and i just had to respond:

    "every time he touches a horse, it counts."

    that's an interesting way to approach a training business, and if that's the case, i've trained a hell of a lot more horses than i ever imagined.

    in my world, it's customary for most trainers to arrange being paid by the hour, by the session (with clearly defined goals and results laid out beforehand) or even by some finished product (ie, you want your horse to jump through a flaming hoop - i don't get paid until his front feet hit the ground on the other side.) i've never heard contact equated with actual training, unless of course this trainer has the power of touch and can train by osmosis, in which case, you should hang onto him! ;-)

    am i missing something here?

  16. jme, if WF were here, I believe she would tell you her intention by that comment was if BG long lined the horse and I rode it and/or tacked untacked and groomed it, she thought he should be paid the full amount regardless of whether I had done half of the work or sometimes even more. This opinion of hers was not, however, even mentioned until Dec of 2009 after most all of our time working together had passed. Had it been presented as part of the contract, I would never have agreed to it. And who would? I doubt that WF herself would agree to this if she were on the other side of it and being the one working while someone else got paid/compensated for all the work that was being done.