The Trainer's Visit
Part 1
It was Tuesday before the trainer arrived. To be perfectly candid, I thought
taking five days to reply to my plea for help was not what I would have done had
the roles been reversed. Considering the gravity of the circumstances, I would
have been there immediately or, at most, the next day. Anything longer seemed
inappropriate considering the urgency of both the charges and the state of my
health. Had I know she would not come out immediately, I'd have called someone
else but it just never occurred to me she would take this long to
respond.
When I got the call she was finally coming, I was definitely
frustrated. I had spent those days in self-deprecating behavior believing I had
no one but myself to blame for the problems on my farm. At no point then was I
allowing myself any kind of understanding due to the gravity of my illness. If
my horses were suffering the buck stopped at me and I carried that distorted
responsibility like the albatross it was.
With word the trainer was
actually coming, I put aside my feelings of frustration thinking I should
probably be grateful she showed up at all. I needed input I could trust to
determine the condition of my herd.
In hindsight I realize her untimely
response was probably a more true indicator of her intent than her words;
reflecting a nonchalance more indicative of her true attitude about my horses
and me but more likely all horses and people in general. Her motives were more
about what she can get from any situation than how she can help but I was too
sick to discern that. She preyed on my vulnerability like the vulture she
is.
Too overpowered by pain and weakness, I was beyond being able to do
another farm tour. I had not recuperated from the last so my body was not
capable of sustaining the kind of effort it would take to get through the barns
viewing each horse and getting important feedback no matter how badly I wanted
to do so.
Not wanting to compromise the evaluation because of my weakened
condition, I had a plan to get the information I needed without me having to
step foot in a single barn. On the computer I set up stall charts with
instructions on where to begin and how to proceed. Each horse had its own line
with a location for notes about weight, condition, feet whatever might be
necessary.
Dave was sent around with this paperwork on a clipboard to
accompany Crystal Baker so I would have a record of what was said about each
horse. He was instructed to make notes on everything she said about each horse.
I didn't want to be relying on his memory or communication skills. I needed this
right so I had an accurate picture of my horses' needs so I could fix
them.
I had the progression laid out in exactly the way I proceed when I
show people the horses. The pages were set up like this: first barn begin on
left, name of the horse in stall 1 Suede, horse in stall 2 Rhet, horse in stall
3 Storm. Move to the right side. Horse in stall 4 Reflection. Go to the hay
barn and so on and so on. Not a single horse was skipped.
The reason I
did this was because I didn't want to rely on Dave's memory or mine. I figured
without the information written down, I would forget what I had been told before
I could even utilize the It.
Before they got through, Jessica showed up
so I asked her to take over for Dave. Knowing my husband is pretty sparse with
his words, I instructed Jessica to take extensive notes so I would have the most
accurate representation of what Crystal had to say. Little did I know when it
was all said and done these notes would display specific misrepresentation of
the horses' condition that would probably have gone unnoticed without them.
Another interesting aspect was Dave's note and Jessica's were very
similar and sparse. Each indicated he/she had written everything that was said
about a horse's condition. In hindsight I look at those notes as deliberately
vague. Considering what I had asked for, there were few indications that any
horse was anything more or less than thin but her words to me told a different
story. Trying to use the list to tell me what I had wanted to know was
impossible because the information was not there.
Her verbal assessment
to me of the herd was not what caused the most harm because its effects were
short lived. The most detrimental and far reaching part of her "help" to me
where the seeds she planted with her words of advice. The damage caused there
would pervade and affect my decision making long after the lies about the
horses' condition was exposed.
To be continued.....
NOTE: This trainer called me last night having heard about the background post I had done. She asked me when "When did we not become friends?" When I tried to answer that question, she continually cut me off, which I then did as well, because I was not going to listen to her manipulations. She insisted I am twisting my words which is not something I am prone to doing. The only people I know who would accuse me of that happen to be those people I confront and some I have exposed for their inappropriate behavior.
Most people would tell you I am honest even when it is painful and that I call things as I see them. I try hard to tell all sides of the story.
With that being said, I will be explaining how I have come to my opinions about this trainer, what she did here and what I believe her motives to be. Some I left unsaid in the background post but I would be more than happy to post the specifics that led to those opinions as well. The bottom line is this woman lies as easily as she breathes air and what she did here was so far from "help" that I can not possibly leave it out of my story. Her behavior had an impact on my life that was not good. She affected how I dealt with difficult issues of the past two years. Her influence in my life will be no more easily forgotten than that of Angie Milles and Richard Galarza.......... so move over Crystal Baker, that's quite some company you have joined.
To be continued..............
The Trainer's Words........
She sounds like a real winner. I've known some people who were such professional liars I don't even think they realize they're lying all the time. Then again there's that old saying "if you believe it, it isn't a lie". Don't know if that applies here though. Where do these unscrupulous people come from anyway. How were they brought up?
ReplyDeleteI remember this event, and I believe you sent me photos of the horses at the time to see what I thought. interesting insights is about all I can say about what you were told
ReplyDelete