Mother's Day Reflections.......

Mother's Day always has an assortment of connotations for me and this year is no exception. Having been through the fight of my life it only makes sense I would see things with fresh perspective. As I finally begin to feel like I really am alive, this day has taken on a new meaning but even that is bittersweet. The milestones marked by this day are forever mixed in unforgettable lines on the etchings that are my life.

The past few years I have managed a horse show on this weekend. That made the focus for this day about doing a good job, followed by getting home safely. Mother's Day was gone by the time I could take a breath. It left little time for pondering relationships long since lost or more recently damaged, let alone the ones intact and nurturing.

Last year I was replaced by that show committee with a person from within their ranks with her own personal agenda. It was done without notice or any kind of warning. I didn't even know it had happened until just days before the event started even though I had been asked to continue on indefinitely as their show manager.  The only one who felt obligated to honor our agreement was me.

Their actions put me in a bad situation financially that would not have happened had I been given the common courtesy of notice of their change in plans. I had turned down two different paying opportunities for that weekend unaware the club had decided to go a different way. With Dave still out of work and all these horses to maintain last Mother's Day carried the biggest financial hardship of the past few years.

After the fact I am relieved not to be committed on Mother's Day weekend every year. Last year I actually got the opportunity to spend the time with my son and his family in a Mother's Day celebration the likes of which I have never experienced before.

It was at that party that I first realized something unusual was happening to my body. Simple antacids not only wouldn't relieve my aching gut but did indeed make matters incredibly worse. I experienced pain more extreme than even childbirth caused by a mere mouthful of bland food. As much as I enjoyed the company, for the first time in my life I found myself in a situation where I didn't dare test fate by eating many of my favorite foods.

It was an ironic position to be in. This amazing acknowledgment from my children commingled with the startling revelation something was seriously wrong with my body. Further complicated by the lack of funds caused by someone else's greed,  Mother's Day last year was the standout beginning in this journey that has forever changed my life and in turn profoundly affected the pursuit of my dream raising Arabian horses.   It was not the only time that greed would rear its ugly head along the road.

To be continued......

A Life Line......