Wednesday, September 4, 2013

A New Player Enters.......

 Part 1

Sometime after Jessica moved in I heard from another young woman I already knew. It was very clear Jessica was not helping with the horses as needed but I was not looking for a replacement for her. I was too ill to be thinking about anything but basic survival.

If anything Jessica was still here because I thought I could help her. I think, being as debilitated as I was, helping her felt like being useful.  I needed to feel some kind of purpose. Lying on the couch every day with others caring for me and my horses made me feel like a huge burden to Dave and Lindsay so it was really important for me to feel like I could help someone. I think Jessica recognized that and knew how to play to that. She may not be the only one.

I am going to include the basic history I had with this young woman so you can see how things developed. I certainly did not have as much interaction with her as I had had with Jessica but there are some similarities between them, as there are with the third. There are many differences too and maybe that is where I got lost. As I am known to say, the devil is in the details. Let's see if you can spot them.

I had met this young woman a few years ago at a Daffodil board meeting. There with her then husband,  she was excited to get involved in club activities. She had a small breeding operation and was very enthusiastic about what lay ahead for her.

I remember that first meeting for a number of reasons. This young woman
looked out of place among this group. Her dress and demeanor suggested a
lack of self esteem. Her knowledge of showing and pedigrees was not what is
usually seen at those meetings but what she lacked in knowledge she seemed to make up for in enthusiasm. She volunteered in some capacity for the Spring Daffodil show. Wanting her to feel welcome, I had made it a point to speak to her at that meeting.

I don't really know how she did as a volunteer at the show, only that she saw me there with Legs and followed us back to our stalls wanting to learn more about him and my breeding program. Sometime after she suddenly up and moved away. I did not pry but she continued to keep some contact with me through FB. She hinted at some kind of trauma that had caused the move but I left it at that respecting her silence.

I think she returned to this area sometime after I got sick. How much she knew about my illness or current condition, I don't know. She knew about my blog so she could have read details there. The specific time I remember her making contact with me after my illness was that Jan while Jessica was still here.  She saw me signed on to FB which is not easy because I was and am only at the computer for a few minutes a day because it is too painful to sit there. Still she managed to catch me and asked my opinion about a mare she was thinking about leasing.

Despite my pain if someone reaches out to me I try to respond except for gaming requests because it is too difficult to sit through those. PMs or chat requests I can usually limit to my capabilities so if I can help someone, I always try. Even just a "Hi" from a friend helps me not feel so isolated so I answer. On this day I responded to Amanda Wright thinking I was just answering a question about a horse. Instead I was opening a door that might forever affect my life.

At first the mare's name meant nothing to me but it turned out I did know of her. She was actually related to Rhet. I rattled off what I knew of the history and show records of the close relatives which was what she was trying to determine, or so she said.

After I finished dispensing all the information I knew about the mare, she told me that Arlene Magid wanted $200 for such information. She wanted to know how Magid comes up with her reports.

I explained how I would proceed including the use of old volumes of Arabian horse magazines as important references. I have an extensive collection solely for this purpose so I can research unfamiliar pedigrees for actual pictures of the individuals instead of relying on the opinions of others. They are a valuable resource for making breeding decisions.

Amanda expressed regret at being without such a resource because of her dream to someday have a large, successful breeding program. It just so happened I had recently been given some early issues of the Arabian Horse Times and Arabian Horse World magazines so I offered the duplicates to Amanda on the condition she come immediately to pick them up. I did not have the room to store them.

That was late winter in 2012. It is unfortunate that this act of kindness opened the door for another exploitation but it did. It seemed harmless enough allowing this person to come here to pick up a few boxes of old magazines but I guess it goes to show nothing is harmless when you are as sick as I was.

I know she would say she meant no harm but the reality is harm was caused here. Also I think it is important to note that there are commonalities in all of these stories that tell how these people ended up here and what they actually did while they were here. It is these common tactics that tell their true intentions, not their words. Talk is cheap but our actions tell the truth about our heart.

Of course in telling the story I have the benefit of hindsight. To some extent my readers do as well. While you don't have the benefit of the details, you do know these people came here and I feel wronged by them. It is in the telling of the story that you will have the opportunity to decide what you think about this.

For myself, I have always tried to give people the benefit of the doubt. We are all human and we all make mistakes. Communication issues are the root of most misunderstandings. I try to utilize this information to avoid hard feelings.

What I have learned through these experiences is that some people don't really care about the other guy, even though they might claim otherwise. They only care about themselves and what they are going to get. Just because someone claims to be a friend does not make them one. Friends are those who come through for you when life gets tough. They give you what you need, even though that might be difficult, and ask nothing in return. Friends are NOT someone who shows up when you are down and takes advantage for their own gain or causes harm in any way. These stories to follow are about both personal gain and harm. Amanda Wright is an expert in both......but it is not her fault, just ask her.

To be continued..

Note: I have decided to use Amanda's full name because I have noticed she is still actively spinning her web. I will explain why I feel that in sequence but for now anyone vulnerable who is thinking she might help them, I would suggest caution.

A New Player continued...........


  1. Guess there's just no end to the treachery of some people. You've had your share of them. That's for sure.

    1. Boy, that's for sure. It was like there was a billboard out of the highway sending them this direction.

  2. ugh - can so relate on some level - i know when i first was diagnosed with Castlemans, there were a few people that i thought we could consider friends (from a church we went to in WI) who were also friends with our real friends, and all of a sudden I was getting emails and pamphlets from them -pyramid schemed type of natural herbs and supplements and the like - that of course they were selling and that of course they thought it "could really help me get better" if i wanted to dump money all of a sudden on them after paying all my real medical bills...just ugh. I HATE people like that.

    1. Oh, those too! I had some like that too. Can't even remember all the brands but UGH is right! Makes my lip curl just thinking about them and they are convinced they know better what is best for us.

  3. Scary how many crooks and how few kind souls you have seen through this struggles

  4. I am fascinated by your story. You are a very good writer, and keep me intrigued. I can't say I am shocked, nor amazed by how people can be. I two have family members (in-laws) that would/have steel people blind, INCLUDING me and hubby! The saying is, "They can sell Ice To Eskimos"! Making you feel that they are doing you kindness, yet in turn robbing you blind, telling lies about us to other family members and friends. AND the sad part is, it all blindsided us and we had not a clue until it all came tumbling down on us! NOW...we are very cautious, and thank goodness, there is many miles between us now, so We do not have to deal with them on a daily basis.