I did not hear the call of a code......... but there must have been one. Almost instantaneously they descended upon me, doctors, nurses, technicians of one sort or another. As I looked up from the chair at the conglomerate of people hovering over me, I could see the concern on their faces.
Aware of the severity of the situation I tried to catch every word and to track every procedure. I wanted to know exactly what was happening to me and everyone around me was way too busy to be explaining. If I wanted to know now, I was going to have to figure this one out for myself.
I heard my surgeon's voice calling out orders in rapid succession as the others around me jumped into action. Words and phrases I was familiar with hung in the air........"type and cross type"........."IV push" ....."heparin".........and others soaked into my brain as I struggled to understand........and to breathe.
As the scene unfolded it reminded me of one of those hospital dramas like Grey's Anatomy or ER, only I was the patient and all those professionals were working on me. Electrodes were pasted onto my body and wires attached while others applied the blood pressure cuff and that clippy thing on the end of one of the fingers of my left hand.
Each twisted tube or tangled wire brought tight lines and tense expressions to the faces of those working on me. Every thing spoke intensity but I stayed present and tried to work with them even though my eyes wanted to close and my body quit.
I heard the beeping of my vital signs as the machines came to life and saw the coming and goings of staff as each raced doing his/her part to keep me alive. There was no question about that but I had lots of questions about why......
Once the initial orders had been given the surgeon began asking me questions of his own. "What happened? was the first, so simple, yet so important. As I struggled to answer him, others followed. Each question a piece to the puzzle he was trying to understand, so he could fix this problem, yet I was having trouble getting the answers out.
My chest felt like some giant octopus had me snarled in its tentacles squeezing the life right out of me. I used all of my strength trying to force my lungs to open up and let the air in. I remember thinking about childbirth and breathing exercises, concentrating on my chest, counting slowly and deliberately in my head, watching it gradually rise as I willed myself to breathe.
A nasal cannula found its way to my nostrils and someone told me to breathe through my nose as the tubing was fitted over my ears and the oxygen turned on. I swear I had a person on each arm drawing blood at the same time and somehow that made sense to me.
One of the nurses asked if I wanted Dave to be called and I nodded my reply........ more with my eyes than with my head. Looking into her eyes, I knew she understood. I think there was someone pushing rhythmically on my chest as I wondered if they would even reach Dave. At this time of the morning he must be out in the barn feeding or cleaning stalls. I wished he was beside me at that very moment but worried how he would take this call. My poor family had been through enough, they didn't need this too.
To be continued.......................
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