Labor Day Thoughts

The implication is when Labor Day arrives, summer is gone. Yet, I can't grasp that could be possible when there's been no summer for me. I spent most of last winter longing for summer convinced with it's arrival I'd actually be able to make some progress around this Arabian horse breeding farm of mine.

I had big plans all mapped out for the summer months. I worked hard in the early spring picking rocks and grooming fields to be sure I'd had a good place to work horses so I wouldn't have to commute to the park. I figured by cutting out the commute time, I could get even more done and I had my list all made out of candidates to be started under saddle.

I had even begun some refresher work with my green broke horses. Introducing them to giving to pressure from the bit without sacrificing forward motion. A few of the horses I planned to get started under saddle I actually managed to get introduced to the surcingle and the bit although all I asked them to do was to carry this equipment as I lunged them.

I couldn't wait for the round pen to dry out enough that I could actually use it but it took its sweet time in drying out this year. It was not until I was in the hospital that the rain finally stopped and the dry days began.

As sick as I was, I did notice what the weather was doing. I was lamenting before I ever left the hospital that Mother Nature was not kind. A mental note was made of each riding day missed and that has continued throughout my time at home.

Despite my consternation at this turn of affairs, I have not fought the inevitable. Knowing that pushing beyond my limits would only hinder my recovery, I have stayed within the guidelines and tried not to dwell on the fact that summer was passing me by.

Still with Labor Day jumping up clearly in my face I cannot help but feel sad that an entire summer is now gone and I barely even got a glimpse of it. Let alone that all my plans were lost and there has been no progress with any of my horses. My business plan is going to need a major over haul and I can't even start then until I have some idea of when I will be back, whatever "back" means.

On the whole the horses don't seem to mind. As long as they catch a glimpse of me now and then and I come up with a treat or even a good rub they seem content except for Dandy and Legs. Those two love to work and tend to feel neglected when they don't get that individual time.
I knew that would be the case with those two. To be honest, it warms my heart to know they missed me like that.

I was surprised to see that Storm also seems to have developed that attitude. He was grumpy when I first visited his stall but I thought it was just general attitude. We have had our little power struggles
since his return so I didn't really expect him to be glad to see me.

It took a few trips to the barn for me to realize Storm was actually greeting me as soon as he heard me in the barn. Then it became obvious he is making a concerted effort to seek my attention, banging his door and nickering to bring me near.

It's not just grooming and snacks Storm is seeking. He's tried to leave the stall with me each time I have visited. I know he's getting plenty of turn out time so I know it's not that. Especially since the other day when Percy got tacked up Storm made a huge fuss. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that Storm wasn't trying to claim it was his turn for such attention. I must admit that felt pretty darn good.

I can hardly wait for the day I can climb back in that saddle. It will be interesting to see if this change of attitude in Storm will carry over into what he does under saddle. Who knows. Maybe we will make it into the show ring next year.

For now, as I struggle with this yearning to be working horses instead of just dreaming them, I find myself wondering if I am wishing my life away by wanting winter to come or just trying to turn the page on a crazy chapter in my life. When I think about last winter's weather, I can't help but think I've gotten a bit nuts wishing for winter at all but then I'd gladly take another winter like the last one over a summer like this one any day.

While my recovery seems to be going along at a snail's pace I feel like I am pretty much sleeping my life away so maybe I shouldn't worry about wishing it away. Whatever it takes to get this chapter over with has got to be a good thing.

I haven't gotten into all the details of my illness and the obstacles that have presented themselves. I do plan to post that story but probably not here except for the ways in which those things have affected my life with the horses.

I am FINALLY beginning to feel almost human again, although I don't have much strength. The biggest thing that has affected my post, or lack there of, has been the problems I have had with my eye sight.

I know I have mentioned many times here that I have a very extreme case of double vision. Most of the time since I acquired this disability I have done a pretty good job of coping with it but something happened when I got sick and my coping mechanism deserted me. That has complicated most every aspect of my recovery from my pain tolerance on up to my ability to walk. Of course, foremost on the list has been my ability to read.

It has always been difficult for me to read from those first days after the accident that caused my double vision. I have never, however, had the amount of difficulty reading that I do currently. As much as I am dying of boredom and really missing reading blogs, I am struggling so much with reading that I haven't been able to even get through the reading of a single post with any kind of retention of its content but I continue to try.

I don't know if it's just me or if Blogger has done something but it seems to me that the text is smaller than I remember and I just cannot seem to get my eyes to focus or my brain to adjust enough that I can take in what I am reading. The only way I have been able to post is to write in Notepad where I can adjust the font big enough that I can read it. A little cut and paste and I'm good and I finally am beginning to feel a little better so I hope to get back into more regular posting soon. In the meantime, just know I miss you all and I'm dying to know how your summers went.