Saturday, January 30, 2010

Just Too Much.....

The day after the Jody Strand Clinic , I felt like I'd been hit by a truck. To be more specific, I guess I felt more like the day I had just arrived home from . my Tulsa trip All of the recuperating I'd done over that few days had totally vanished. Both my body and my mind were wiped out.

It was at that time that I realized how much the trip had really taken out of me. I really should have stayed home to continue my recuperation than ride horses at the clinic. Even with that I couldn't wait to get out to ride Legs to begin working on reteaching my horse how to use his back.

Despite my best intentions I just couldn't make myself ride. First off, I knew my horse was exhausted too and he made that clear. Each time I got near his stall he pinned his ears at me. I knew the only fair thing to do was to give him some additional time off. I figured the horse needed at least a week's time.

The week came and went and I still wasn't on a horse. My horse was still pinning his ears for a couple more weeks. I tried to get myself to write all the entries for my trip and I couldn't even get that done. I was forcing myself to make entries each day......and as I'm sure some of you know I was not always successful. More days than I wish to admit slipped by without a post.

At least those days were sporadic. I was dragging so I think had I missed more than one or two a week, I could have easily allowed myself to stop posting all together. Because I do this blog out of my dedication to the Arabian horse, I managed to keep myself going despite how tired I was. It was not an easy task.

When I did get myself back to riding, I had to force myself to start. Getting out of bed in the morning seemed to take all the energy I had. Mustering up the added strength it took to load up the trailer to go to Angie and Richard's just wasn't coming easily. I also convinced myself if I went that I should at least make the trip worthwhile and fill the trailer.

I don't know if that thinking slowed me down or not. My desire to have Legs right for this show season is so strong, I doubt the added weight of working two more horses was enough to dampen my determination. I was just so darn worn out both physically and mentally that I couldn't even convince myself riding Legs would be productive at that point.

I think I debated myself each morning sitting in the chair in my living room. Would I or wouldn't I ride that day. The wouldn'ts just seemed to win over and over again. I think the telling part was through none of this time did I ever feel bored.

I am not a person who sits still easily. I am always up to something. During this time I found myself sitting and sitting and not noticing I was still sitting. The day would be gone and I hadn't even made my way to the barn. Something was definitely amiss.

I finally went to the doctor. I was so concerned about my lack of energy. He just laughed at me when he heard about my trip as he reminded me of my age. Whether I liked it or not I had to be content to sit until something told me I was ready to ride.

Eventually,I did manage to get some things done here that had been piling up. There's so much more to this business than just training horses. The paperwork part is the easiest for me to shove to the side so I got my records caught up with all the expenses from my trip as well as the stacks off my desk. A job that should have taken me a day or two ended up taking weeks.

At least by the time I finally did complete that jog, I was able to convince myself I'd rather ride than have to do anymore paperwork. Funny how such threats can get us going sometimes. I told myself at the start of the next week I was definitely going to begin working horses.

Then I had to decide which horses I was going to take. There's so many of them here that need work. Part of this job is constantly reprioritizing what's going to get done depending on what has happened and what needs to happen.

I didn't want Rhet to loose the condition I had worked so hard to attain so that made in a priority. Since Tag is the most likely candidate to make it into the ring as a junior horse this year, he was and is a priority as well. Then finally getting Legs fixed properly is at the top of my list. Those three Arabian horses made for my trailer full.

It might have been December before I actually began working horses on a regular basis.Before that I may have gone a day here or there but nothing consistent. I would come home so wiped out I couldn't pull off another day.

The plan was once I began I would work one load the first week. Then I would add a second load the second week but that just didn't happen. It seemed like the whole time I was working the first load I was worrying how I was ever going to make a second load. But by December I was able to keep myself moving forward at least to complete that one load a day.

I just couldn't seem to get my stride. After working three horses and getting them put away at home, I would drag myself back into the house to promptly fall asleep in my chair. Not being one prone to napping, this behavior seemed indicative of how much my trip to Tulsa had really stripped from me.

It was a long, slow recovery. One that would have been a lot harder to make, were I not finally seeing some improvements in Legs. The spark fueled by little snippets of ride that were what I'd been striving towards from the start gave me the ability to keep going when I was feeling so whooped! Funny how putting a name to a problem can change one's perspective.

Thank you Jody Strand............... details to follow.............

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  1. I can sympathize with you. There are some days I just don't feel like working them either, then there are days when I force myself and wind up feeling better afterwards that I got it done. It's hard to feel tired and out of energy, but at least you had a good excuse. That trip would have wiped anybody out and you needed to regroup and get your energy back.

  2. I am glad you were forced to realize this trip was over and above what you could do, so you won't try it alone again. However, we do need to get a plan in action so you can go again with help, and maybe a driver.
    Now, at the end of January, I hope you are back to feeling normal...?

  3. You need to take care of yourself Mikael! You went through so much on that trip and it does take us longer to come back from something like that then when we were 20. When I think of all the energy I had 'back in the day' I just can't hardly imagine it. Work all day at my job then get horses ready for the show, pack the camper, cook the food, get clothes ready, get tack ready, well you know the routine! Now I don't think I could do it all. You amaze me at all you do but of course you aren't nearly as old as I am so that helps. Oh, I am rambling....

    Yes, I am very concerned about Nick and how he acts when he is off the lead for the first time. It will probably be tomorrow and I think I will put some hay in the middle of the ring and hopefully he will be interested in that more then running and acting foolish. He has to have a shot of something in that hock, don't know yet what it's for but will find out. He's only nine, I hope he doesn't have continued problems with this all.

    Glad you liked my redwork quilt. I may post a few more of the blocks. I thought she did a pretty good job drawing the Arabian block, not perfect but you could tell what breed it was. She loved horses her whole life and her best friend raised Arabians. I went there many times with her to see them, wish I could remember the blood lines to tell you but that is long gone!

    Take care!!!

  4. Arlene, I always feel better afterwards too and I do feel that way most of the time. But after Tulsa, it was a different kind of tired. It was almost scary how drained I felt.

    Molly, I hope I never have to do this alone again either. However, I would go alone before I would skip going all together.

    As for the end of January, there have been changes here that actually have me feeling better. I didn't realize I was experiencing an outside drain, but I was.

    Midlife Mom, I know you're right but I sure hate to admit it. Bouncing back used to be so easy.

    As for a plan to have help and a driver I sure hope so. I guess time will tell.

    As for age I'm not sure you're all that much older than me. If that's the case, I guess I don't know how old you are. One thing for sure though, anything past 60 and things changed.......and it sure wasn't for the better. LOL

  5. You really do have some beautiful horses. I used to love to ride on horses but now I can't even get out of the house, so ride as long as you can because one day it won't be possible.

  6. I hear you... I am on the back side of 40 & had a pretty active horse year. Sept. especially was very busy - lots of traveling, riding and one competition. After our Sept. finale "Cowgirl Weekend", I was exhausted. I didn't ride for a couple weeks & then early winter hit. I think our minds just want to keep going and the body sometimes tells us "whoa!" :)

    (Tag does have a very pretty face).