Rachel and Grandma and the Arabian Horse Crash and Burn! Part 2

Part 1 of the Baby Boomer Series

Crash and Burn Part 1


Rachel's treatment of the Arabian horse didn't fit my expectation in any way shape or form. All the kid had to do was inspect the horse's back visually and feel for heat before she put the pads and saddle in place and then check the satin to be sure it was still functional. That was three separate safeguards to protect this horse from having a problem. Obviously she neglected to do any of the three.

I try not to talk to people when I am angry. I tend to be unreasonable. Having the very first Arabian horse I ever bred be the object of this abuse, I was beyond angry and into livid. I decided to put some distance between Rachel and me. That would give me time to think and time to figure out what to do. There was no way I was going to continue to put this horse in jeopardy because Rachel wasn't paying attention.

Rachel was supposed to be coming directly to the barn after school that day. But as usual, she called to see if she could be late or maybe even skip coming at all. I took a deep breath before I answered the phone and swallowed down a whole lot of attitude.

I explained about the worn hairless spots I had found on Dandy's back. I also told her that she couldn't even begin to imagine how angry that I was at her. I said since I didn't want to say something I would regret, I would talk to her later. However, she should know that she wouldn't be riding Dandy anytime soon. In the meantime I was going to have to think about how I was going to handle this situation. Then I hung up.

Later that night I spoke to her mother. I wish I could say that was helpful. Instead I got all kinds of excuses for Rachel and how this could happen. I knew that this was coming. Part of the problem has been Colleen enabling Rachel's behavior.

I was ready. I cut her off in mid sentence and told her this had to stop. She was not doing Rachel any favors by making excuses for her behavior. This didn't happen overnight, it had taken weeks for this horse's back to get like this. The proof was in the condition of the pad. There were going to be changes.

I could already imagine the excuses running through Rachel's head and that only made my madder. I wasn't just mad at Rachel, I was mad at her mother as well. Her constant enabling had only fueled Rachel's manipulations. I could see that was going to happen again.

By the next day, I got a phone call from Rachel. She was telling me that Mariah agreed that Dandy's back had not been like that the day before when she had saddled him. So again, Rachel was shirking responsibility. Much more impressed with being "right" than she was for the well being of my horse, there was little if any remorse.

Dealing with this situation was going to involve getting her mother to butt out. She had done nothing but get in the middle and undermine my authority from the start. Instead of being respected as someone with the knowledge and experience I have, I had been reduced to the ranks of family member in a family with no respect.

This may not make sense to many of you, if you have been fortunate enough to be raised in loving families. But if you have read my other blog, you know the history of abuse that is there. My grown children and their families have lots of destructive issues carried over from the days before my healing therapy.

TV commercials speak of "breaking the cycle of abuse." The perception is stopping the abuser fixes things somehow. But the truth is the ramifications of child abuse are visited upon the children and grandchildren and on. If the family members are not ALL healed and the family rules that enabled that abuse are not changed, the wounds do not heal. The disabling behavior is taught to children. The heartache that comes from families struggling for personal power is devastating. It takes generations to heal a family.

Horses and Rachel had been a way to work on the healing that was so obviously needed for her and her mother. I know more than most how healing horses can be when they are in your blood (and even when they are not). Taking the needs of the horse and the mental health of the child into account were going to take some thought. This project had to work.

To be continued..............

Part 3

Visit Blog Village and vote daily for this blog Here They are now measuring the rankings by votes out, so if you find my blog on the site, please click that link too to improve my rankings. TY


Arabian horse arabian horses horses horse horse show