Tuesday, April 26, 2011

\a Troll's Perspective.........

It's my belief the story cannot be told without telling all aspects of it. From those things behind the scenes to those more obviously up front and in the open, all of the things related to the story exert pressure of some sort and add to the stress involved in living through such an event and recovering from it.

To understand what it was like to have lived this journey, I've tried to represent everything that affected me along the way.. There are a couple of things I am still struggling with whether I will post or not and I guess we'll just have to wait and see where I end up. For now the one piece of undisclosed information is that comment left by a troll on my other blog. The specific blog post, A Little Bit of Clarification was the place the comment was left but you'll see from it's content, it really address the story I was telling here about the lawsuit.

A comment such as this, I don't think really can just roll of the back of any reasonable person even though it's way off base. I'm posting it because it's affected me and in a way continues to affect me but I'm also posting it because there's something about anonymous comments being hidden away at the bottom of posts under a cloak of secrecy that seems to give some people nerve they otherwise wouldn't have. Putting their comment up front in a post directed straight at them seems to diffuse some of that power they think they have and make them feel just a little more vulnerable. To me that sounds like leveling the playing field a bit..........and believe me..........I'm all for that...........so here goes with the perspective of this troll...........

I have been following your blog for a while now and i've been keeping my mouth shut when it comes to your posts but i cant any longer...it seems that if your daughter really is the way you describe her as she learned it from you.... your whole blog blames someone else rather than yourself for any bad thing that has happened or is happening to you... as for your most recent post in your horse blog how can you blame someone for something that you weren't even there to see?! i think you need to learn to take responsibility in your own actions and decisions rather than blamin everything on other people....and have you even though about why your daughter or her children may of gotten the impression that you hate them? you sit there and trash talk them on your blog and make them out to be horrible people what kind of mother or grandmother would do that to her family...maybe you dont have a handle on your personalities because it seems there are hole in your storys that you just cant fill or your mind has decided to fill them with fiction and thing that didn't happen ... i've competed against your grandaughter and know of the barn you trash talk you make them out to be animals or monsters when in reality they are not its just what you see them as and you post it all over the internet how they have screwed you over but maybe you did it to yourself... you say you have a handle on your personalities but when you go from one to another in the middle of a situation and then write about it later and that isn't what happened or there are things you left out or missed is it just you lying or you getting old and losing your mind or is it you losing control... when your pushing a point or telling a story and not just one or two people are telling you your wrong but everyone involved is doing so maybe they aren't ganging up on you to make you the bad guy maybe your actually wrong...you talk like you know so much about horses and how they have to be taught to be able to compete in the shows and you trash talk every trainer you've been with why dont you just do it yourself and put your words into actions and save yourself the trouble and save everyone the headache and trouble from having to put up with you and listening to you do the "oh poor me" routine, it gets old.

I'm still digesting how I feel about this comment and all it's interesting little jabs. If you have thoughts about it feel free it express them.

The description of yesterday's picture was incorrect. That was Andy but he was out with his mother, Krugorrs Heiress. This is the picture of Andy visiting with Legs.

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  1. Anyone who would write so disparraginly about mental health issues isn't anyone whose opinion is worth anything. Aside from the fact that they are almost illiterate (maybe they should be congratulated for not being too embarrassed to write in public?), this is just hate writing. Please don't spend a lot of time agonizing over it - it's the uneducated rambling of someone who wants to hurt you and doesn't know any better than to write this.

  2. Well I would not let this nonsense bother me. Although, she does sound like she thinks she is more than qualified to be a practicing psychologist/psychiatrist. And then again her grammar is stellar, we know she is not only opinionated but highly educated. I haven't seen so much misuse of spelling and grammar since I was in 4th grade.

    I love it when people have nothing better to do but tear into others when they know nothing about what is actually going on. Burn it or put it in the manure pile where it belongs.

  3. First thing I teach anyone about the internet, and blogging in particular is : DO NOT FEED THE TROLLS. You should either delete the comment or leave it unanswered. You can change your setting to being able to check which comments get posted or not. But giving someone like that any attention whatsoever is playing along with their little game. And they always turn into mind games which you don't need. So sorry this happened to you.

  4. I say she/he could have stopped reading at any time. There are people out there who will say black just because you say white. I've had a run in with someone like that myself and while I researched and found the information I needed to completely blow her out of the water and actually wrote the blog post that would do so, in the end I decided it was enough to know that I was correct and she was wrong. I hope that in time you will be able to let this persons comments go.

  5. Wow, the nerve. I also would ignore the comment. There are just too many rude and obnoxious people out there, and I've seen it all (I use to work in retail management). The commenter definitely has a spelling issue, as in they can't spell.
    I know it's hard not to take people's rudeness personal, but I would just let it go. Every one has their own opinion and unfortunately hers had to be one of pure nastiness. So sorry you have had to go through this, on top of everything else!

  6. Yes, do not feed the trolls. But do suggest they use grammar/spell check!

  7. Don't give that person nor their comment another thought! That's easier said than done...I know...but they're just not worth it! ((HUGS!!))

  8. My first thought about this anonymous post is that it is from a very young person , late teens early 20's and being fed by more than one individual. It rambles and is somewhat furtive in that it was placed on the wrong blog. In light of all the other info coming out about your daughter and GD, I would suspect that they made have had a hand in it .
    That said , a furtive ,attack such as this , deserves and warrants no respect , I cannot tell you not to let it hurt, because , I suspect the source(or part of ) is what is likely so painful .
    You have succeeded in this case and in the industry , and I think you need to remind yourself of the respect you have earned from the likes of your Dr friend and the lawyer and your other friends and associates in the industry . After all was said and done , "the devil was in fact in the details "
    And the truth won out .
    You have shown yourself to be a classy lady of integrity and morals . They , and those that supported them ... not so much . Hold your head high and let the childish blather be a memory (fading quickly)

  9. you know,
    when I was reading your story, I posted a few times (as Baxtersmum) about how maybe you should have given your daughter the benefit of the doubt.

    You replied at the time to "Wait and see - I'm leaving some detail out right at this point in the story."

    And boy, were you right!! As you unfolded things more i realized how off base I had been with my first impressions.

    From the outside, things are always so much "clearer." But unless its your heart stomped on, your trust rejected, you really don't know.

    As far as the comment, drama begets drama. Based on the writing style, I suspect its either one of GD's teenage peers or an infantile adult. No doubt it is someone who felt outraged at your expression of fear, disappointment and frustration. As far as I'm concerned, you have been exceptionally careful to describe things as objectively and factual as possible - me, I would have frothed at the mouth if only HALF of those things you described had happened to me....

    Take the comment it as someone who feels obliged to protect MD and GD (however immaturely) and try to take comfort that they have defenders, albeit severely misguided ones.

    I am truly sorry that your relationship with them has deteriorated so much. And I'm also sorry that if what you describe of their behavior is accurate (as I suspect it is) you feel like you've somehow failed in your attempt to raise compasionate, mature, and ethical family.

    The older I get, the more I think that parenting is equal parts skill and luck - the best parents in the world will raise monsters if they don't get lucky, and gosh knows there are some awful people out there who raised pretty amazing kids.

    Let the commenter go. If they(she, I suspect) can do nothing but attack you, rather than provide "counter point" and details where you misrepresented the truth, then its just hot air. And its just as possible that this person has been misled like many of the other people in your story.

    shrug. Let it go, if you can. You've done what you can, and you've made it clear that the door will be open provided there is respect and maturity. I don't know what else anyone can ask of a parent.

    Best wishes!
    Scarlett, aka BaxtersMum, aka Enginerd

  10. I agree with fernvalley--sounds like a younger person wrote it. What they don't understand is that you/we have a right to tell our stories--they are a part of us. Everyone reading should know that they are from our perspective. I wouldn't think too much about it, especially since it got rather emotionally charged at the end which betrays what may be a strong connectedness to the other parties. The other thing about all of this is that you left it anonymous--which was a kind thing to do. I have no idea who any of these people really are--nor did I ever think I needed to know. I was just happy to share your personal journey.

  11. I call total crap. As a simple example, MiKael, you have been exceptionally kind to ME, a complete internet stranger! In my (limited, ha) experience, kindness to a complete stranger, without any intent or consideration of repayment, is absolutely indicative of quality character.

    That comment is just cruel. I have been slowly wrapping my mind around the idea that people can be cruel *on purpose.* Just because I would not stoop to such things on my worst day does not preclude other people from doing that as their daily routine.

    I would like to try and type some more, but the overwhelming reality of 4 exams this week is eating up my ability to write anything. Neoplasias, yes. Anything else, no. :)

  12. It never ceases to amaze me how pig ignorant (and that's an insult to pigs!) people are about confrontation. It's not the ones involved they should worry about, but the silent, disinterested witnesses they need to consider. How they conduct themselves in any situation is far more revealing about their character than mere words. When someone is on the outside looking in, they don't have emotion or past history to blind them; they are not caught up and perhaps see more than those involved might assume.

    This is not directed at you, btw, but your childish little friend. He or she was earned far more contempt than any point he or she was trying to make.

  13. I agree with what Fernvalley's comment states! The commentor comes across as naive and young. I base my opinion on the lack of punctuation and general poor grammar (not that I'm perfect in that department).

    I hope you didn't take that comment too much to heart. First off, I've never once read your blog and thought that you've bad mouthed your daughter and/or granddaughter. I usually feel like your just expressing concern or hurt regarding their actions and sometimes I even feel that you're trying to reach out to them through your blog. It's too bad that this person didn't see that.

    I also think it's quite clear that whoever wrote this is in someway connected with BG or WF. They've heard or know only one side of the story. I think you should not give this person the time of day after this post; they're obviously not worth it!

  14. If you read the comment, there's not one iota of evidence--- just a bunch of frothing ranting.

    I also find the commenter's hypocrisy kind of funny - "Take responsibility!" he/she cries, from behind their anonymous mask.

    Judging from the way they continually brought up the "personalities", your age, your "control"...it's obvious they were trying to push your buttons. I'm surprised they didn't end it with "Neener, neener, you're a big fart-eater!"

    Stay classy, Anonymous. Stay classy.

  15. Typed my response and Blooger ate it! Sheesh.

    You have much better things to concern yourself with, than the likes of someone who is but a troll. Sheeples, minions, blind followers, call them what you will- they are all pretty much the same.

    Spelling grammar and punctuation? Fail on all three. This person needs to make some major improvements if they want to be taken seriously.

    I have dealt with similar people, only in real life. At first you are mad or caught off guard by the things they write or say. That soon subsides when you see through the anger at how pathetic they really are. They have incredibly Loooong arms, reaching for anything and everything to throw at you and grasping at straws the whole time.

    Funny that. When you have the truth to back your words, you have a strong foundation to stand on. You are in no fear of going under, being sucked down by them- the pond scum.

    You are right. Two ways to deal with a troll. Ignore them or meet them head on. Or is that beat them on the head? *shrugs* Either one works for me. lol Take your pick!

    Trolls do hope for a reaction. Problem is, the one they get, may not be the one they expected. Being ignored, blown off, laughed at, held up for scrutiny or ridicule... all reactions, but not the ones they hope for.

    Chin up MiKael. You have better things to look forward to! Actually the troll complimented you.

    You DO know you stuff, you DO know how to train a horse- so go out there and DO just that! You can Own your knowledge & skill. By all means, quit waiting on or paying others to screw the horses up. You are just making more work for yourself later on down the road. *grins & hugs*

  16. I agree, that comment was obviously posted by a child who is writing on somebody's behalf. The thing about kids is they don't have the life experience to have a clue what they're talking about but think they do anyway. Heck, I'm 32 and I don't have the life experience to have a clue half the time.

    I feel kind of sad for this kid who was raised and educated so poorly that they felt they could leave a comment like this making very negative comments about someone's very personal pain. The comment says much more about the person who wrote it than you.